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CHAPTER 6

 

SOME OTHER SCRIPTURES ON MARRIAGE ISSUES

 

Following are a few further scriptures which have some bearing on the subject of this discourse:

42. THE VIRTUOUS WIFE

Proverbs 31:10-31 defines a virtuous wife as follows:

10 Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain.

12 She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeks wool and flax, and willingly works with her hands.

14 She is like the merchant ships, she brings her food from afar.

15 She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household, and a portion for her maidservants.

16 She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard.

17 She girds herself with strength, and strengthens her arms.

18 She perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night.

19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hand holds the spindle.

20 She extends her hand to the poor, yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed with scarlet.

22 She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies sashes for the merchants.

25 Strength and honor are her clothing; she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.

28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:

29 "Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all."

30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates. (NKJ)

It seems clear from this passage that a virtuous wife is one who conducts herself responsibly, brings honour to her husband, is God fearing AND conducts her own business enterprises. Thus it would seem that the "woman's liberation" movement which has demanded greater freedom for women to become involved in commerce, etc are fully justified, Yahweh Himself has ordained such for a virtuous wife. Thus it would seem that the idea of a "kept woman" frequently associated with Western Christianity is not scriptural. In fact many Christian wives who complain that their husbands do not keep them in the manner to which they wish to become accustomed should examine themselves carefully, perhaps their husbands are not generating sufficient revenue to the family purse precisely because the wife should be helping him materially to support the family?

43. THE ONE FLESH BOND

Genesis 2:24 in the Amplified Bible states:

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife and they shall become one flesh. (AMP)

Matthew 19:5-6 in the Amplified Bible states:

5 And said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be united (joined inseparably) to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?

6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder (separate). (AMP)

It is particularly important to note the amplification "joined inseparably" in the above passage. Taken together with the phrase "let not man put asunder" this starts to reveal the full extent of the one flesh bond as an unbreakable spiritual bond granted by God in order to bind husband and wife together. As the bond intensifies through repeated sexual encounters, so will love also intensify if both parties give themselves to one another in accordance with scripture. 1 Corinthians 6, quoted below clearly reveals that multiple one flesh bonds can coexist. Matthew 19:5-6 clearly indicates that the one flesh bond cannot be broken by man.

a. A MAN CAN BE "ONE FLESH" WITH MORE THAN ONE WOMAN

1 Corinthians 6:15-20 states:

15 Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not!

16 Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For "the two," He says, "shall become one flesh."

17 But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him.

18 Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.

19 Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?

20 For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God's. (NKJ)

Here we surely see confirmation that many men can become one flesh with a harlot and that a man can become one flesh with more than one woman. We also see the direct correspondence between the sexual act between husband and virgin wife and the new birth resulting in the born again believer becoming one spirit with the Lord Jesus Christ. We also see that becoming one results from sex and not from marriage vows and we see no indication that it is a transitory or reversible state.

b. THE ONE FLESH BOND SUPPORTS AN ORDERLY HIERARCHY OF GOVERNANCE BETWEEN CHRIST AND THE CHURCH

illustrates the scriptural forms of the one flesh bond. From this it is apparent that a man married to one or more women provides a "covering" as discussed in section 51, page 140 and that a man married to several woman represents a state of spiritual order which is entirely consistent with the manner in which Yahweh has ordered many things in His word. For example, in Exodus 18:21 it is stated:

"Moreover you shall select from all the people able men, such as fear God, men of truth, hating covetousness; and place such over them to be rulers of thousands, rulers of hundreds, rulers of fifties, and rulers of tens. (NKJ)

Throughout scripture one finds reference to hiearchies of this nature instituted by God. Should we not therefore accept that a similar hierarchy is envisaged for marriage? Should we not also recognize the potential instability of monogamy implied by the diagram? A man who is the head of several wives is underpinned by a number of women who are one flesh with him and who intercede for him and assist him to accomplish all that God has called him to do. He is no longer reliant on other men's wives and other strangers to perform tasks which are critical to his mission, he can rely on his own body to assist him.

c. THE HUSBAND AS HEAD OF THE WIFE

Ephesians 5:23-24 states:

23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.

24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. (NKJ)

1 Corinthians 11:3-15 states:

3 But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.

4 Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonors his head.

5 But every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, for that is one and the same as if her head were shaved.

6 For if a woman is not covered, let her also be shorn. But if it is shameful for a woman to be shorn or shaved, let her be covered.

7 For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man.

8 For man is not from woman, but woman from man.

9 Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man.

10 For this reason the woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head, because of the angels.

11 Nevertheless, neither is man independent of woman, nor woman independent of man, in the Lord.

12 For as woman came from man, even so man also comes through woman; but all things are from God.

13 Judge among yourselves. Is it proper for a woman to pray to God with her head uncovered?

14 Does not even nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a dishonor to him?

15 But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her; for her hair is given to her for a covering. (NKJ)

These passages are an extension of Genesis 3:13-16:

13 And the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."

14 So the LORD God said to the serpent: "Because you have done this, you are cursed more than all cattle, and more than every beast of the field; on your belly you shall go, and you shall eat dust all the days of your life.

15 And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her Seed; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise His heel."

16 To the woman He said: "I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." (NKJ)

In this last verse we gain greater insight as to why Satan is so determined to have wives rule over their husbands through feminism and enforced monogamy. If a man is limited to one wife he has no recourse to an alternative if that wife seeks to dominate him.

d. THE CONSEQUENCES OF UNGODLY OR UNFULFILLED ONE FLESH BONDS

For as long as a person has one flesh bonds with past sexual partners (whether heterosexual or male-male) that person is caught up in a spiritual spiders web which causes confusion, conflict and torment and which opens the door wide for Satan to attack that person. This is shown diagramtically in . In biological terms this is "polygamy", sexual intercourse of many males with the same group of many females. Paul says that fornication is a sin against your own body and, as you gain an appreciation for the strength of the one-flesh bond you will understand why.

Section 81, page 207 contains a case history of a man with intense personal experience regarding the one flesh bond. After an extra-marital affair while backslidden and away from God in a traditional church he was eventually brought back from the brink of destruction by God in His Grace and given an opportunity to repent and truly serve Him. After a year and half of intense prayer, much conflicting counsel and general uncertainty the Lord showed him about the one flesh bond through the scriptures cited above and through the book "One Flesh" by Bob Yandian. It is a spiritual bond formed during sexual intercourse, seemingly a spiritual emission in concert with the physical emission. Fully developed it is an incredibly strong, near telepathic, bond which will keep sexual partners together against separation. As far as I have been able to determine it is a bond which cannot be broken by man, it can only be broken by heartfelt, humble petition to Almighty God to extend mercy and grace and break the bond since we are told that no man should put asunder. Perhaps Matthew 19:6 actually signifies that no man is able to put asunder? Unless the bond to be broken results from a failed marriage in an ungodly environment or from adultery of fornication, it seems unlikely that it will be broken under normal circumstances. In this man's experience and in our experience ministering to others, humble petition in the name of Jesus is the only way and then only when there are grounds for the petition which are acceptable in the sight of God. In such a case the person concerned must pray with a humble and a contrite heart with someone praying in agreement.

As far as I have been able to determine this is a very specific prayer and very different to any other prayer that one might pray. Having confessed any sin associated with the one flesh bond, repented of it and received forgiveness, one should then pray along the lines "Father I acknowledge that I cannot break this one flesh bond with ....... [name]. I ask you in the name of Jesus, by your mercy and your grace, to cut this one flesh bond at my end and at ....... [name]'s. I thank you Lord for setting me free. In Jesus name. Amen."

Accordingly, the one flesh bond is a bond that in cases other than true divorce, can only be broken when it has come into existence through sin. clearly demonstrates the basic one flesh network which develops when a woman has sexual intercourse with more than one man. As promiscuity (fornication) increases, the spiders web shown in develops. A person who has had sexual encounters with others and lost contact with them may have grounds for the breaking of this bond. However, a man who has taken the virginity of a woman and then moved on may find that Yahweh requires him to fulfill his scriptural obligation to that woman and take her as wife. If she has subsequently remarried and had children then it may be that she is de-facto divorced and it is possible that Yahweh will release them but it seems that there are also instances where Yahweh may require the wife to return to the man who took her virginity. We have ministered in a situation where after over twenty years of marriage God showed a woman that her marriage was adulterous after He had taken her out of the marriage and brought her original lover back into her life. In such a situation, unless the one flesh bonds are broken, the woman will never be able to give herself wholeheartedly to her husband and she constantly find herself pulled away in different directions. The same will happen to a man who has one flesh bonds with women who are not living with him as his wives.

A woman who has been promiscuous, an adulterress or a harlot will find herself caught in a spiritual spiders web, enmeshed with every man she has ever had intercourse with and, in turn, enmeshed with all the others each of those has had intercourse with. By extension, men become one flesh with other men as illustrated in and . This is an abomination in the sight of our Holy and Uncompromisingly Righteous God. People in this situation identify strongly with a metaphor of having invisible elastic ropes attached to them which constantly pull them in every direction and cause them to feel incomplete. Typically it appears that this feeling of incompleteness drives them to constantly seek "love" from new faces, thus compounding the situation.

e. WHY THE ONE FLESH BOND DOES NOT REQUIRE LOVE OR LUST TO BE FORMED

The one flesh bond is an incredibly powerful spiritual force that Yahweh has give mankind to bind husband and wives. A man who takes a wife and has regular intercourse with her, both giving themselves to the other without restraint or qualification, will find that love will grow and become more intense with time to a point where they cannot live without one another and feel incomplete when separated. This is the one flesh bond, an example of the power of love and Yahweh's wisdom. A marriage consumated without love but entered into with a total commitment on the part of both parties not to withhold anything and to consider only the other party, will become a marriage of intense love.

Thus love is NOT a prerequisite for marriage. Marriage with a wholehearted commitment to give all that is scriptural to the spouse in marriage IS A PREREQUISITE FOR TRUE LOVE IN MARRIAGE! In fact, it seems to me that so-called "love" between a man and a woman before marriage is never true marital love as Yahweh intended it and, in fact, it may be little better than lust!

f. THE ONE FLESH BOND CREATS A SPIRITUAL UNDERPINNING FOR THE HUSBAND

Note also that several women joined with one flesh bonds to one man will be in a state of spiritual balance and harmony. In a sense, the wives of a man are the pillars of his house. 1 Timothy 3:15 states:

15 but if I am delayed, I write so that you may know how you ought to conduct yourself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth. (NKJ)

The implication here is that the church (which is a plural entity) is the pillar on which the truth (which is Jesus) rests. Again the imagery would seem to be powerful. A man underpinned by several wives will be more stable than one standing on a single pillar. As each wife has different God given attributes, so she underpins her husband in a different area of his life and ministry as implied in figure .

Conversely, a man joined to a woman who is joined to other men will find himself experiencing a form of spiritual dislocation and jealousy, exemplified by , which he will be unable to explain.

Furthermore, the one flesh bond creates a spiritual unit or house which, if it is divided, cannot stand. Thus, if a man is not living with a woman with whom he is one flesh his house will be divided and my own experience indicates, is likely to suffer continuous financial lack as described in section 52, page 149.

g. ONE FLESH IN MARRIAGE CORRESPONDS TO ONE BODY IN CHRIST

Ephesians 5:31-32, discussed in sections 9 9.e, 9.e, page 27 and section 51, page 54, also cites Genesis 2:24 in the context of the relationship between Christ and the church:

31 "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh."

32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. (NKJ)

We must surely conclude that the one flesh bond between husband and wife has tremendous spiritual significance!

Consider Romans 12:4-5:

4 For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function,

5 so we, being many, are one body in Christ, (NKJ)

1 Corinthians 10:16-17:

16 The cup of blessing which we bless, is it not the communion of the blood of Christ? The bread which we break, is it not the communion of the body of Christ?

17 For we, though many, are one bread and one body; for we all partake of that one bread. (NKJ)

1 Corinthians 12:11-31:

11 But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually as He wills.

12 For as the body is one and has many members, but all the members of that one body, being many, are one body, so also is Christ.

13 For by one Spirit we were all baptized into one body-- whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free-- and have all been made to drink into one Spirit.

14 For in fact the body is not one member but many.

15 If the foot should say, "Because I am not a hand, I am not of the body," is it therefore not of the body?

16 And if the ear should say, "Because I am not an eye, I am not of the body," is it therefore not of the body?

17 If the whole body were an eye, where would be the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where would be the smelling?

18 But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased.

19 And if they were all one member, where would the body be?

20 But now indeed there are many members, yet one body.

21 And the eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you"; nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you."

22 No, much rather, those members of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary.

23 And those members of the body which we think to be less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor; and our unpresentable parts have greater modesty,

24 but our presentable parts have no need. But God composed the body, having given greater honor to that part which lacks it,

25 that there should be no schism in the body, but that the members should have the same care for one another.

26 And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; or if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.

27 Now you are the body of Christ, and members individually.

28 And God has appointed these in the church: first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, after that miracles, then gifts of healings, helps, administrations, varieties of tongues.

29 Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Are all workers of miracles?

30 Do all have gifts of healings? Do all speak with tongues? Do all interpret?

31 But earnestly desire the best gifts. And yet I show you a more excellent way. (NKJ)

Is it not significant that this passage immediately leads into 1 Corinthians 13, discussed in section 9.i, page 31 which describes in detail the agape love of God? Does this scripture also not make it very clear that God, in His wisdom created people different to perform different functions in the body of Christ? Is it therefore not likely that God has created women different to perform different functions in the "one flesh" of the man? Would this not explain the extent to which men become dissatisfied with the "short comings" of their wives and enter into relationships with other women only to find that they have other shortcomings. Is this not what gives rise to the myth of the ideal "life partner" which God supplies and which pastors preach about and conduct lengthy counselling sessions to assist couples to determine whether they are the ideal fit for one another. If one accepts the scriptural principles contained in this document, surely one must accept that if a man has a need that is not met by his first wife that is to be expected, it is no reflection on his first wife, it simply reflects that God never intended one woman to necessarily complement one man. The response to this problem is therefore merely to take another wife, particularly in the present age where Isaiah 4:1, also discussed in section 9.j, 9.j, page 33, and section 55, page 157, quite clearly indicates that there will be seven times more women than men in the Body of Christ and that these women will desire to marry and will be willing and able to supply their own food and clothing:

And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, "We will eat our own food and wear our own apparel; only let us be called by your name, to take away our reproach."

Does this not remove the "performance pressure" from women constantly fearing being compared with other women and rejected because of some imaginery greater perfection. Does it not remove the competition and jealousy which occurs between so many women? How can a woman truly submit to and reverence her husband when she lives in constant fear of being compared with other women and being rejected at any time because monogamy forces her husband to choose. How can a woman extend the agape love of God to an unmarried sister in Christ if she constantly fears that that woman may steal her husband instead of considering the posibility of extending the covering of her husband to that woman with the prospect of them becoming best friends? I pray that by now you can see that God's plan for marriage is so radically different and better from anything that you have been taught!

44. SOUL TIES

The one flesh bond is NOT a soul tie, a soul tie is something completely different.

In 1 Samuel 18:1-4 it is reported:

1 Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.

2 Saul took him that day, and would not let him go home to his father's house anymore.

3 Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul.

4 And Jonathan took off the robe that was on him and gave it to David, with his armor, even to his sword and his bow and his belt. (NKJ)

The word knit in 1 Samuel 18:1 is the word qashar, Strong's number 7194:

Strong defines 7194 qashar (kaw-shar') as:

a primitive root: to tie, physically (gird, confine, compact) or mentally (in love, league):

KJV-- bind (up), (make a) conspire (-acy, -ator), join together, knit, stronger, work [treason].

While it's usage is diverse it certainly refers to a vary strong joining or binding of the soul's of David and Jonathan.

The soul tie can be formed between any two people of either gender. It does not require sexual congress. It is not a contract or a vow, it is a deep empathy and bond borne out of Godly love and respect. It occurs in marriage as a consequence of the attraction between husband and wife but it can occur between any man and woman who are deeply attracted to one another or who are simply really good friends. In some cases the soul tie will be inappropriate and must be renounced and cut off. After divorce or after repentance from adultery the soul tie with the former spouse or lover must also be renounced and cut off.

As best I can determine the soul tie is not a necessary prerequisite for marriage although there is likely to be a soul tie by the time of marriage or shortly thereafter. However, it would seem possible that in a marriage where there is no love or even mutual respect or empathy a soul tie would not necessarily be formed.

45. THE BLOOD LINE

Throughout scripture reference is made to geneaologies, the so-called "blood line". The blood line carries curses from generation to generation. It also seems that it has some spiritual dimension in a similar vein to the one flesh bond. In fact, it would appear that the sexual sins identified in Leviticus 18 and Leviticus 20, discussed in section 14, page 55 may correspond to comparable spiritual confusion in the blood line to that described for the one flesh bond as resulting from fornication and adultery.

46. MARRIAGE TO EMPLOYEES

Exodus 21:1-11 states:

1 "Now these are the judgments which you shall set before them:

2 "If you buy a Hebrew servant, he shall serve six years; and in the seventh he shall go out free and pay nothing.

3 "If he comes in by himself, he shall go out by himself; if he comes in married, then his wife shall go out with him.

4 "If his master has given him a wife, and she has borne him sons or daughters, the wife and her children shall be her master's, and he shall go out by himself.

5 "But if the servant plainly says, 'I love my master, my wife, and my children; I will not go out free,'

6 "then his master shall bring him to the judges. He shall also bring him to the door, or to the doorpost, and his master shall pierce his ear with an awl; and he shall serve him forever.

7 "And if a man sells his daughter to be a female slave, she shall not go out as the male slaves do.

8 "If she does not please her master, who has betrothed her to himself, then he shall let her be redeemed. He shall have no right to sell her to a foreign people, since he has dealt deceitfully with her.

9 "And if he has betrothed her to his son, he shall deal with her according to the custom of daughters.

10 "If he takes another wife, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marriage rights.

11 "And if he does not do these three for her, then she shall go out free, without paying money. (NKJ)

In this passage, which deals with servants or slaves, it is apparent that the employer is free to marry his unmarried female workers, provided he does not do so at the expense of those to whom he is already married. Surely we must conclude that it is acceptable in the sight of God for a man to marry his unmarried secretary or other employee, even if he is already married?

We further see that even in the case of a slave or servant, if a man takes a second or subsequent wife "he shall not diminish her [the first wife's] food, her clothing, and her marriage rights". Presumably the same applies to a wife who was not originally a servant. Accordingly it appears that this passage does provide a guarantee for a first wife when her husband takes further wives that the conditions agreed to at the time of her marriage or in common practice before the taking of subsequent wives, shall not be diminished. Clearly this is a constraint that any subsequent wives must be made aware of and agree to before marriage and it surely creates a challenge for any man in our society who married monogamously and wants to take another wife.

Surely we must conclude that only where God gives guidance should a man in this age consider taking further wives, unless of course he already has additional wives through so-called "extra marital" relations and which he now realizes he is required before Yahweh to acknowledge and act on.

47. A WIFE IS A GOOD THING

Proverbs 18:22 states:

22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD. (NKJ)

Lamsa's translation of Proverbs 18:22 states:

22 He who finds a good wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD. And he who puts out a good wife, puts out a good thing from his house.

Proverbs 19:14 states:

14 Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the LORD. (NKJ)

Are two of a number of scriptures which indicate that marriage is a blessing from the Lord. There is nothing to indicate that this is restricted to the first wife or to "wife", singular.

48. ROTTENNESS IN THE BONES AND CONTENTION

Some other scriptures which have a bearing include Proverbs 12:4:

4 An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones. (NKJ)

In considering this scripture, remember Genesis 2:23-24:

23 And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man."

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (NKJ)

We therefore see that a woman who is one flesh with a man is called bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh - truly they are one. Accordingly a wife who causes shame brings about a sensation which can be likened to "rottenness in his bones". I have experienced this with a wife who is in strife and division with her husband, it is like something inside is rotten and pulling apart. God created man to walk in unity with his wives and a wife who does not walk in unity will have a materially negative effect on her husband. Conversely a wife who is in harmony and unity with her husband will bouy him up and he will achieve great exploits for his God in such a situation and will also accomplish much more for his family. Clearly this requires that the husband is seeking to serve God faithfully.

Proverbs 21:9:

9 Better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman [wife]. (NKJ)

Proverbs 25:23-24:

23 The north wind brings forth rain, and a backbiting tongue an angry countenance.

24 It is better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman [wife]. (NKJ)

Proverbs 27:15-16:

15 A continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman [wife] are alike;

16 Whoever restrains her restrains the wind, and grasps oil with his right hand. (NKJ)

Noting that the Hebrew words for woman and wife are the same, as discussed in section 39, page 112, it is apparent that Yahweh has expressed Himself clearly about the implications of a wife who dishonours her husband and brings shame to him and a wife who is contentious and argumentative. Surely we must see this as a type of the rebellious and argumentative Christian who does not submit to Jesus as their Lord and King? There is much that we have to learn including women learning that it is not their place to argue with and demand of their husbands and husbands learning to become like Jesus so that their wives can indeed love them as they aught.

1 Peter 3:1-2 provides a stark contrast to the contentious wives cited above:

1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. (NKJ)

Can there be any doubt that God does not intend a wife to harass or nag her husband but to submit to him and love him and pray for him if he does get out of the will of God or into error?

49. RIGHTEOUS ANGER OF A BETRAYED HUSBAND

Consider that if Yahweh becomes angry with his wives in Ezekial 16 and 23, as discussed in section 41.e, page 122, should not a husband be angry when a wife deals treacherously?

Consider also Proverbs 6:23-35:

23 For the commandment is a lamp, and the law a light; reproofs of instruction are the way of life,

24 To keep you from the evil woman, from the flattering tongue of a seductress.

25 Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids.

26 For by means of a harlot a man is reduced to a crust of bread; and an adulteress will prey upon his precious life.

27 Can a man take fire to his bosom, and his clothes not be burned?

28 Can one walk on hot coals, and his feet not be seared?

29 So is he who goes in to his neighbor's wife; whoever touches her shall not be innocent.

30 People do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy himself when he is starving.

31 Yet when he is found, he must restore sevenfold; he may have to give up all the substance of his house.

32 Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul.

33 Wounds and dishonor he will get, and his reproach will not be wiped away.

34 For jealousy is a husband's fury; therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance.

35 He will accept no recompense, nor will he be appeased though you give many gifts. (NKJ)

Clearly there is a place for righteous anger on the part of a husband who has been betrayed by his wife.

In this context, it is interesting to consider that Esther 1:1-22 reports an event which would seem to be of some relevance:

1 Now it came to pass in the days of Ahasuerus (this was the Ahasuerus who reigned over one hundred and twenty-seven provinces, from India to Ethiopia),

2 in those days when King Ahasuerus sat on the throne of his kingdom, which was in Shushan the citadel,

3 that in the third year of his reign he made a feast for all his officials and servants-- the powers of Persia and Media, the nobles, and the princes of the provinces being before him--

4 when he showed the riches of his glorious kingdom and the splendor of his excellent majesty for many days, one hundred and eighty days in all.

5 And when these days were completed, the king made a feast lasting seven days for all the people who were present in Shushan the citadel, from great to small, in the court of the garden of the king's palace.

6 There were white and blue linen curtains fastened with cords of fine linen and purple on silver rods and marble pillars; and the couches were of gold and silver on a mosaic pavement of alabaster, turquoise, and white and black marble.

7 And they served drinks in golden vessels, each vessel being different from the other, with royal wine in abundance, according to the generosity of the king.

8 In accordance with the law, the drinking was not compulsory; for so the king had ordered all the officers of his household, that they should do according to each man's pleasure.

9 Queen Vashti also made a feast for the women in the royal palace which belonged to King Ahasuerus.

10 On the seventh day, when the heart of the king was merry with wine, he commanded Mehuman, Biztha, Harbona, Bigtha, Abagtha, Zethar, and Carcas, seven eunuchs who served in the presence of King Ahasuerus,

11 to bring Queen Vashti before the king, wearing her royal crown, in order to show her beauty to the people and the officials, for she was beautiful to behold.

12 But Queen Vashti refused to come at the king's command brought by his eunuchs; therefore the king was furious, and his anger burned within him.

13 Then the king said to the wise men who understood the times (for this was the king's manner toward all who knew law and justice,

14 those closest to him being Carshena, Shethar, Admatha, Tarshish, Meres, Marsena, and Memucan, the seven princes of Persia and Media, who had access to the king's presence, and who ranked highest in the kingdom):

15 "What shall we do to Queen Vashti, according to law, because she did not obey the command of King Ahasuerus brought to her by the eunuchs?"

16 And Memucan answered before the king and the princes: "Queen Vashti has not only wronged the king, but also all the princes, and all the people who are in all the provinces of King Ahasuerus.

17 "For the queen's behavior will become known to all women, so that they will despise their husbands in their eyes, when they report, 'King Ahasuerus commanded Queen Vashti to be brought in before him, but she did not come.'

18 "This very day the noble ladies of Persia and Media will say to all the king's officials that they have heard of the behavior of the queen. Thus there will be excessive contempt and wrath.

19 "If it pleases the king, let a royal decree go out from him, and let it be recorded in the laws of the Persians and the Medes, so that it will not be altered, that Vashti shall come no more before King Ahasuerus; and let the king give her royal position to another who is better than she.

20 "When the king's decree which he will make is proclaimed throughout all his empire (for it is great), all wives will honor their husbands, both great and small."

21 And the reply pleased the king and the princes, and the king did according to the word of Memucan.

22 Then he sent letters to all the king's provinces, to each province in its own script, and to every people in their own language, that each man should be master in his own house, and speak in the language of his own people. (NKJ)

If one accepts that Yahweh indeed inspired the book of Esther and that He inspired the chain of events which led to Esther becoming queen, must we not conclude that the actions of King Ahasuerus have some scriptural basis in line with the scripture cited earlier? Does this scripture not indicate clearly that in the days of that the Proverbs were recorded wives showed more respect to their husbands?

50. VIRGIN DAUGHTERS

1 Corinthians 7:25-40 states:

25 Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy.

26 I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress-- that it is good for a man to remain as he is:

27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife.

28 But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.

29 But this I say, brethren, the time is short, so that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none,

30 those who weep as though they did not weep, those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice, those who buy as though they did not possess,

31 and those who use this world as not misusing it. For the form of this world is passing away.

32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord-- how he may please the Lord.

33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world-- how he may please his wife.

34 There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world-- how she may please her husband.

35 And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction.

36 But if any man thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virgin, if she is past the flower of youth, and thus it must be, let him do what he wishes. He does not sin; let them marry.

37 Nevertheless he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own will, and has so determined in his heart that he will keep his virgin, does well.

38 So then he who gives her in marriage does well, but he who does not give her in marriage does better.

39 A wife is bound by law as long as her husband lives; but if her husband dies, she is at liberty to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

40 But she is happier if she remains as she is, according to my judgment-- and I think I also have the Spirit of God. (NKJ)

Overall these verses give some guidance with regard to recommendations by Paul, which he stresses are not necessarily inspired by the Holy Spirit, regarding virgins and it is apparent that his thoughts regarding widows changed between writing the first letter to the Corinthians and writing 1 Timothy 5:9-14, referred to in section 40.f where he commands them to marry.

Verses 36 to 38 are somewhat problematic in most, generally available translations. Lamsa, cited in section 36, interprets these verses from the Aramaic, as follows:

36 If any man thinks that he is shamed by the behavior of his virgin daughter because she has passed the marriage age and he has not given her in marriage and that he should give her, let him do what he will and he does not sin. Let her be married.

37 If he has sincerely decided and is not forced by circumstances, but has determined and decreed in his heart to keep his virgin daughter single, he does well.

38 So then he who gives his virgin daughter in marriage does well; and he who does not give his virgin daughter in marriage does even better. (Lamsa)

This seems to be a more logical interpretation and removes some challenging ambiguities present in most other translations.

51. THE HUSBAND PROVIDES A "COVERING" TO HIS WIFE

Ruth 2:1-4:22 records:

CHAPTER 2

1 There was a relative of Naomi's husband, a man of great wealth, of the family of Elimelech; his name was Boaz.

2 So Ruth the Moabitess said to Naomi, "Please let me go to the field, and glean heads of grain after him in whose sight I may find favor." And she said to her, "Go, my daughter."

3 Then she left, and went and gleaned in the field after the reapers. And she happened to come to the part of the field belonging to Boaz, who was of the family of Elimelech.

4 Now behold, Boaz came from Bethlehem, and said to the reapers, "The LORD be with you!" And they answered him, "The LORD bless you!"

5 Then Boaz said to his servant who was in charge of the reapers, "Whose young woman is this?"

6 So the servant who was in charge of the reapers answered and said, "It is the young Moabite woman who came back with Naomi from the country of Moab.

7 "And she said, 'Please let me glean and gather after the reapers among the sheaves.' So she came and has continued from morning until now, though she rested a little in the house."

8 Then Boaz said to Ruth, "You will listen, my daughter, will you not? Do not go to glean in another field, nor go from here, but stay close by my young women.

9 "Let your eyes be on the field which they reap, and go after them. Have I not commanded the young men not to touch you? And when you are thirsty, go to the vessels and drink from what the young men have drawn."

10 So she fell on her face, bowed down to the ground, and said to him, "Why have I found favor in your eyes, that you should take notice of me, since I am a foreigner?"

11 And Boaz answered and said to her, "It has been fully reported to me, all that you have done for your mother-in-law since the death of your husband, and how you have left your father and your mother and the land of your birth, and have come to a people whom you did not know before.

12 "The LORD repay your work, and a full reward be given you by the LORD God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge."

13 Then she said, "Let me find favor in your sight, my lord; for you have comforted me, and have spoken kindly to your maidservant, though I am not like one of your maidservants."

14 Now Boaz said to her at mealtime, "Come here, and eat of the bread, and dip your piece of bread in the vinegar." So she sat beside the reapers, and he passed parched grain to her; and she ate and was satisfied, and kept some back.

15 And when she rose up to glean, Boaz commanded his young men, saying, "Let her glean even among the sheaves, and do not reproach her.

16 "Also let grain from the bundles fall purposely for her; leave it that she may glean, and do not rebuke her."

17 So she gleaned in the field until evening, and beat out what she had gleaned, and it was about an ephah of barley.

18 Then she took it up and went into the city, and her mother-in-law saw what she had gleaned. So she brought out and gave to her what she had kept back after she had been satisfied.

19 And her mother-in-law said to her, "Where have you gleaned today? And where did you work? Blessed be the one who took notice of you." So she told her mother-in-law with whom she had worked, and said, "The man's name with whom I worked today is Boaz."

20 Then Naomi said to her daughter-in-law, "Blessed be he of the LORD, who has not forsaken His kindness to the living and the dead!" And Naomi said to her, "This man is a relation of ours, one of our close relatives."

21 Ruth the Moabitess said, "He also said to me, 'You shall stay close by my young men until they have finished all my harvest.'"

22 And Naomi said to Ruth her daughter-in-law, "It is good, my daughter, that you go out with his young women, and that people do not meet you in any other field."

23 So she stayed close by the young women of Boaz, to glean until the end of barley harvest and wheat harvest; and she dwelt with her mother-in-law.

CHAPTER 3

1 Then Naomi her mother-in-law said to her, "My daughter, shall I not seek security for you, that it may be well with you?

2 "Now Boaz, whose young women you were with, is he not our relative? In fact, he is winnowing barley tonight at the threshing floor.

3 "Therefore wash yourself and anoint yourself, put on your best garment and go down to the threshing floor; but do not make yourself known to the man until he has finished eating and drinking.

4 "Then it shall be, when he lies down, that you shall notice the place where he lies; and you shall go in, uncover his feet, and lie down; and he will tell you what you should do."

5 And she said to her, "All that you say to me I will do."

6 So she went down to the threshing floor and did according to all that her mother-in-law instructed her.

7 And after Boaz had eaten and drunk, and his heart was cheerful, he went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain; and she came softly, uncovered his feet, and lay down.

8 Now it happened at midnight that the man was startled, and turned himself; and there, a woman was lying at his feet.

9 And he said, "Who are you?" So she answered, "I am Ruth, your maidservant. Take your maidservant under your wing, for you are a close relative."

10 Then he said, "Blessed are you of the LORD, my daughter! For you have shown more kindness at the end than at the beginning, in that you did not go after young men, whether poor or rich.

11 "And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you request, for all the people of my town know that you are a virtuous woman.

12 "Now it is true that I am a close relative; however, there is a relative closer than I.

13 "Stay this night, and in the morning it shall be that if he will perform the duty of a close relative for you-- good; let him do it. But if he does not want to perform the duty for you, then I will perform the duty for you, as the LORD lives! Lie down until morning."

14 So she lay at his feet until morning, and she arose before one could recognize another. Then he said, "Do not let it be known that the woman came to the threshing floor."

15 Also he said, "Bring the shawl that is on you and hold it." And when she held it, he measured six ephahs of barley, and laid it on her. Then she went into the city.

16 So when she came to her mother-in-law, she said, "Is that you, my daughter?" Then she told her all that the man had done for her.

17 And she said, "These six ephahs of barley he gave me; for he said to me, 'Do not go empty-handed to your mother-in-law.'"

18 Then she said, "Sit still, my daughter, until you know how the matter will turn out; for the man will not rest until he has concluded the matter this day."

CHAPTER 4

1 Now Boaz went up to the gate and sat down there; and behold, the close relative of whom Boaz had spoken came by. So Boaz said, "Come aside, friend, sit down here." So he came aside and sat down.

2 And he took ten men of the elders of the city, and said, "Sit down here." So they sat down.

3 Then he said to the close relative, "Naomi, who has come back from the country of Moab, sold the piece of land which belonged to our brother Elimelech.

4 "And I thought to inform you, saying, 'Buy it back in the presence of the inhabitants and the elders of my people. If you will redeem it, redeem it; but if you will not redeem it, then tell me, that I may know; for there is no one but you to redeem it, and I am next after you.'" And he said, "I will redeem it."

5 Then Boaz said, "On the day you buy the field from the hand of Naomi, you must also buy it from Ruth the Moabitess, the wife of the dead, to perpetuate the name of the dead through his inheritance."

6 And the close relative said, "I cannot redeem it for myself, lest I ruin my own inheritance. You redeem my right of redemption for yourself, for I cannot redeem it."

7 Now this was the custom in former times in Israel concerning redeeming and exchanging, to confirm anything: one man took off his sandal and gave it to the other, and this was a confirmation in Israel.

8 Therefore the close relative said to Boaz, "Buy it for yourself." So he took off his sandal.

9 And Boaz said to the elders and all the people, "You are witnesses this day that I have bought all that was Elimelech's, and all that was Chilion's and Mahlon's, from the hand of Naomi.

10 "Moreover, Ruth the Moabitess, the widow of Mahlon, I have acquired as my wife, to perpetuate the name of the dead through his inheritance, that the name of the dead may not be cut off from among his brethren and from his position at the gate. You are witnesses this day."

11 And all the people who were at the gate, and the elders, said, "We are witnesses. The LORD make the woman who is coming to your house like Rachel and Leah, the two who built the house of Israel; and may you prosper in Ephrathah and be famous in Bethlehem.

12 "May your house be like the house of Perez, whom Tamar bore to Judah, because of the offspring which the LORD will give you from this young woman."

13 So Boaz took Ruth and she became his wife; and when he went in to her, the LORD gave her conception, and she bore a son.

14 Then the women said to Naomi, "Blessed be the LORD, who has not left you this day without a close relative; and may his name be famous in Israel!

15 "And may he be to you a restorer of life and a nourisher of your old age; for your daughter-in-law, who loves you, who is better to you than seven sons, has borne him."

16 Then Naomi took the child and laid him on her bosom, and became a nurse to him.

17 Also the neighbor women gave him a name, saying, "There is a son born to Naomi." And they called his name Obed. He is the father of Jesse, the father of David.

18 Now this is the genealogy of Perez: Perez begot Hezron;

19 Hezron begot Ram, and Ram begot Amminadab;

20 Amminadab begot Nahshon, and Nahshon begot Salmon;

21 Salmon begot Boaz, and Boaz begot Obed;

22 Obed begot Jesse, and Jesse begot David. (NKJ)

Ruth 3:9 in the Amplified Bible reads in part:

"....... And she answered, I am Ruth your maidservant. Spread your wing (of protection) over your maidservant, for you are next of kin." (AMP)

The context of this verse is one of Ruth, a Moabite woman who had married a Hebrew sojourner in her land. Her husband, his father and his brother all die and Ruth is left a widow with her mother-in-law Naomi and returns to Israel with her, declaring that "your people shall be my people and your God my God" (Ruth 1:16). This acceptance by Ruth of the God of Israel and the people of Israel, thus forsaking her gentile inheritance is a clear type of any person accepting the Lord Jesus Christ as saviour and wholeheartedly adopting the Christian faith. From other verses we gather that Ruth had not made a shallow decision but an uncompromising decision to "go all the way". She left her family and native land and adopted and complied with the social practices of her adopted faith and land. In fact, Ruth is so esteemed in the sight of God that she became the mother of Obed, the father of Jesse the father of King David and her name is explicitly recorded for eternity in the genealogy of the Messiah, the Lord Jesus Christ in Matthew 1:5:

5 Salmon begot Boaz by Rahab, Boaz begot Obed by Ruth, Obed begot Jesse, (NKJ)

On this basis, we must accept that the steps taken by Ruth, a widow, to seek the protection of Boaz, a "near kinsman" are entirely appropriate and correct in the sight of God. She was not being forward when she approached Boaz, she was acting in accordance with laid down scriptural protocol in accordance with Deuteronomy 25:5-10.

The interpretation of this verse of scripture is very eloquently presented by William Schnoebelen in his book "Masonry, Beyond the Light". I quote verbatim from pages 230-232:

"HEADSHIP

"Paul teaches that the 'head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man' (1 Corinthians 11:3). This is how men and women are created by God. Two other key verses in this passage tell us:

'But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as is she were shaven...For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. 1 Corinthians 11:5, 8-10

"Although this is a rather deep passage, it is not too deep that it cannot be interpreted by turning to the Bible itself for help. The first part is clearer. The husband is to be the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the husband. Paul clarifies this principle elsewhere, telling us:

'For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the Saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word. Ephesians 5:23-26

"It is not a question of the husband 'lording it over' the wife as much as it is the husband giving himself up for his wife, laying down his life for her as Jesus did for the church. This is not a permit for abusive behaviour on the part of husbands in any way, shape or form. The wife must be submitted to the husband, but the husband must be Christ-like in his care and devotion to the wife. He must be the channel through which the Holy Spirit can 'sanctify and cleanse' his wife.

"TO SPREAD YOUR COVERING

"The last part of the passage quoted above is the most puzzling. What does 'For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels' mean? This verse, and the ones preceding it, have often been interpreted with total literalness, to the extent that women have felt obliged to wear veils or hats to church.

"However, the word here is 'power', which obviously means more than a veil. If we stand aside and let the Bible interpret this passage, it all becomes clear. In Ruth 3:8-9, we find the elegant Hebrew custom to which Paul is referring:

'And it came to pass at midnight, that the man was afraid, and turned himself: and behold, a woman lay at his feet. And he said, Who art thou? And she answered, I am Ruth thine handmaid: spread therefore thy skirt over thine handmaid: for thou are a near kinsman.

"Ruth is asking Boaz, her near kinsman, to marry her out of obligation to his dead relation, Mahlon, her former husband. For him to cover her with his skirt was a way of saying that he would marry her, taking her under the mantle of his protection, even as we, the church, are under the mantle of Jesus' protection.'

"When a Godly man marries a woman, he takes 'power' over her because of the angels. Which angels are being referred to is unclear. Some say they are not good angels, but fallen angels, which might attack or tempt the wife, Others say they are good angels who are scandalized by seeing a wife out from under the authority of her husband.

"Although we cannot be certain, I prefer the first explanation, especially since there are two other places in scripture which seem to indicate that fallen angels might be very dangerous to unprotected women (Genesis 6:2, Jude 6-7). Thus, it is the duty of the man to provide a spiritual covering for his wife.

"Why is this? Because it is the way the Lord made the marriage relationship. It is the way men and women are put together, In a good, Christian marriage, the husband is the covering for the wife -- her shepherd, her 'lightning rod', if you will. He takes all the flak for her, even as Jesus did for us. He should be both a unique font of blessing for her and her strong protector from attack, whether spiritual or physical."

I have no doubt that the above interpretation is substantially correct, I have independently encountered a teaching by Benny Hinn on "Demons and Devils" which makes a related point about Genesis 6:2-6 referring to fallen angels taking on their human form and having sexual intercourse with women, thus giving rise to the race of giants of which Goliath was one of the last.

It is these same angels which are referred to in Jude 1:6:

6 And the angels who did not keep their proper domain, but left their own abode, He has reserved in everlasting chains under darkness for the judgment of the great day; (NKJ)

and 2 Peter 2:4:

4 For if God did not spare the angels who sinned, but cast them down to hell and delivered them into chains of darkness, to be reserved for judgement.

Genesis 6:1-8 reads:

1 Now it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born to them,

2 that the sons of God saw the daughters of men, that they were beautiful; and they took wives for themselves of all whom they chose.

3 And the LORD said, "My Spirit shall not strive with man forever, for he is indeed flesh; yet his days shall be one hundred and twenty years."

4 There were giants on the earth in those days, and also afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of men and they bore children to them. Those were the mighty men who were of old, men of renown.

5 Then the LORD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intent of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.

6 And the LORD was sorry that He had made man on the earth, and He was grieved in His heart.

7 So the LORD said, "I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth, both man and beast, creeping thing and birds of the air, for I am sorry that I have made them."

8 But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD. (NKJ)

It seems that there are a reasonably large number of believers who accept that the term "sons of God" refers to angels and that the passage above therefore refers to fallen angels marrying women. One teaching holds that since Satan realized that the only way that God could regain dominion over the earth legally was for the Messiah to be born of a woman and that, by instructing his fallen angels to marry as many women as possible, he could corrupt the blood line so completely that it would not be possible for a sinless man to be born of woman.

Genesis 3:14-16 states:

14 So the LORD God said to the serpent: "Because you have done this, you are cursed more than all cattle, and more than every beast of the field; on your belly you shall go, and you shall eat dust all the days of your life.

15 And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her Seed; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise His heel."

16 To the woman He said: "I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." (NKJ)

It is widely accepted that the woman's seed referred to here is the singular seed which was Jesus Christ born of a woman that He might crush the head of the serpent, that is Satan.

Revelation 20:1-3 states:

1 Then I saw an angel coming down from heaven, having the key to the bottomless pit and a great chain in his hand.

2 He laid hold of the dragon, that serpent of old, who is the Devil and Satan, and bound him for a thousand years;

3 and he cast him into the bottomless pit, and shut him up, and set a seal on him, so that he should deceive the nations no more till the thousand years were finished. But after these things he must be released for a little while. (NKJ)

It therefore appears that for Jesus Christ to be born of a woman and to be sinless it was necessary for there to be a woman whose blood line descended from Adam WITHOUT the contamination resulting from contamination by sexual intercourse of women with fallen angels. According to this interpretation Noah and his sons were the only remaining men on earth who were genetically and spiritually uncontaminated by this impregnation, hence the need for the flood to destroy all other humans. Apparently one or more of Noah's sons wives was not pure and that was how the giants propagated after the flood and why Israel had to completely destroy them when they came out of Egypt and why David's victory over Goliath was so significant.

According to this interpretation, once an angel has sinned by having intercourse with a human woman he is cast into chains for the day of judgement as referred to in Jude 6 and 2 Peter 2:4. As a consequence, Satan's compliment of angels was seriously diminished and he could not afford to again try this avenue. Presumably this does not prevent him from trying again at the end of the age should he conclude that there is benefit to be gained. Something like this may be a prerequisite for the birth of the "beast" of Revelation but this is outside the scope of this book.

In this light, the responsibility of Christian men to provide covering to Christian women in these last days becomes of greater significance if we take account of the level of deception that is expected to accompany the end of the age.

General observation of daily occurrences also indicate that many unmarried Christian women become desperate about not having a husband and often fall into the trap of marrying unsaved husbands who frequently abuse them. This leads to immense suffering, sometimes to backsliding and often to divorce. Others fall victim to their sexual needs and find themselves repeatedly succumbing to the advances of men who take advantage of their vulnerable position. Many Christian women in this situation become desperately unhappy.

In continuing with our analysis of Ruth, it is important to note that at no point is there an indication whether Boaz already had a wife and it will be apparent from Exodus 21:10 that this is not a relevant question. Since scripture explicitly permits a man to take more than one wife there was no need for Boaz to be unmarried and, in fact, careful analysis of the passage indicates that Boaz was considerably older than Ruth, he refers to the "young men" and this further indicates that it is highly unlikely that he was unmarried.

We should furthermore note that there was another man who was a closer kinsman than Boaz but that he declined to marry Ruth because she was a Moabitess, prohibited by Deuteronomy 23:3 & 4. From this we observe a degree of discretion on the part of the person who was technically the first in line who, on the grounds of a scriptural constraint, chose to decline to perform the required service. Note that Deuteronomy 25:5-10 lays down a serious reproach for the man who declines to perform this duty without scriptural grounds:

5 "If brothers dwell together, and one of them dies and has no son, the widow of the dead man shall not be married to a stranger outside the family; her husband's brother shall go in to her, take her as his wife, and perform the duty of a husband's brother to her.

6 "And it shall be that the firstborn son which she bears will succeed to the name of his dead brother, that his name may not be blotted out of Israel.

7 "But if the man does not want to take his brother's wife, then let his brother's wife go up to the gate to the elders, and say, 'My husband's brother refuses to raise up a name to his brother in Israel; he will not perform the duty of my husband's brother.'

8 "Then the elders of his city shall call him and speak to him; and if he stands firm and says, 'I do not want to take her,'

9 "then his brother's wife shall come to him in the presence of the elders, remove his sandal from his foot, spit in his face, and answer and say, 'So shall it be done to the man who will not build up his brother's house.'

10 "And his name shall be called in Israel, 'The house of him who had his sandal removed.' (NKJ)

Clearly, refusing to marry such a woman is not a decision to be taken lightly.

As a counterpoint, it is apparent that the application of these scriptures in these days would be difficult to be taken entirely literally, after all there is nowhere that such a woman could go to find a group of elders who would currently stand by while she spat in her late husband's brothers face! That does not necessarily not mean that this is not what she is entitled to do.

Keep in mind that 1 Timothy 5:9-15 states:

9 Do not let a widow under sixty years old be taken into the number, and not unless she has been the wife of one man,

10 well reported for good works: if she has brought up children, if she has lodged strangers, if she has washed the saints' feet, if she has relieved the afflicted, if she has diligently followed every good work.

11 But refuse the younger widows; for when they have begun to grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry,

12 having condemnation because they have cast off their first faith.

13 And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which they ought not.

14 Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

15 For some have already turned aside after Satan. (NKJ)

We see the same principle, with the same implication of entry for Satan carried into the New Covenant, again with no indication that Paul foresaw the possibility of there not being enough unmarried men to go round. The implication again being that the fact that a man was already married did not prevent him from marrying a widow in order to give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

Surely then, by implication, the current marriage practices of the church are giving the adversary (Satan) enormous opportunity to speak reproachfully! Of what great judgment will those be subject who resist the truths presented in this book?

The bottom line must surely be that any unmarried Christian woman whether a virgin, a widow or a scripturally legitimately divorced woman who is earnestly seeking God for a husband, has a prerogative to approach the man whom God has shown to her and ask him to extend his covering to her. It would seem that the only basis for him to refuse to marry her would be if he is quite certain that the approach is not of God! This requires a major change in paradigm by all concerned. The Christian woman is entitled to a covering and the Christian man is obliged to provide it if God has allocated the responsibility for that woman to him, no matter how many wives he may already have!

52. FINANCIAL LACK RESULTING FROM A DIVIDED HOUSE

We have already seen in section 43.f, page 131, that the one flesh bond between husband and wives brings about a spiritual unity which corresponds to the house of the husband.

In Matthew 12:25 we read:

25 But Jesus knew their thoughts, and said to them: "Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and every city or house divided against itself will not stand. (NKJ)

Luke 11:17 confirms this:

17 But He, knowing their thoughts, said to them: "Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation, and a house divided against a house falls. (NKJ)

In section 48, page 136, we have also seen that contention and shameful conduct by a wife bring about a condition which can be likened to rottenness in the bones.

Furthermore, 1 Pet 3:1-7 states:

1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.

3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward-- arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--

4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,

6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.

7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (NKJ)

The practical implication of these scriptures is that if a man's house is divided it will not stand and his prayers will be hindered. The author knows an individual who has experienced this on several occassions and has also seen how, when husband and wife come into agreement sudden breakthroughs are experienced.

In ministering to others we have encountered numerous instances where a man has had one flesh bonds with women with whom he is not living, either because he abandoned the woman or women in question or for other reasons. In such cases, particularly where the man concerned is seeking to serve God, Satan has taken maximum advantage of the situation to destroy that man's finances. In several cases I have had to tell the man concerned that until he restores his wife or wives to right relationship he will remain in poverty and where he has no scriptural basis for divorce he must resolve his differences with his wife. This situation is compounded where a wife sets demands on her husband before he can return or where she was the one who instituted the separation in the first place.

Women with one flesh bonds in comparable situations may also find themselves in lack but, the most extreme cases that I have encountered have been men who have been financially destitute. No matter what they put their hand to Satan comes and kills, steals and destroys until the opportunity is utterly eliminated.

In other cases, women who intuitively understand this principle use it to manipulate their husbands. The author knows of a case where a woman, seeking to control her husband, systematically came into agreement with him until his business picked up dramatically and then ruthlessly entered into controversy with him causing spiritual forces to destroy the new found opportunity, purely as some form of power play to demonstrate that she was in control of the marriage.

Modern marriage guidance within the church frequently identifies this principle as a factor in financial lack but then proceeds to tell the husband to come into agreement with his wife! Clearly this is directly contradictory to 1 Peter 3:1, quoted above, where wives are told to submit to their husbands. A marriage in which the wife calls the shots, sometimes because a man truly loves God and has no hope of taking a second wife because he thinks it is against the Word of God, is an abomination in the sight of God!

53. ACCOUNTABILITY OF THE WIFE FOR THE HUSBAND

As an extension of the principle of the husband being the head of the wife or ruling over her, it would seem reasonable to conclude that the wife is not "responsible" for the husband. Accordingly, should the wife become aware that her husband is sinning or in error, she presumably has a responsibility to inform him of this in an appropriate fashion. However, since he is her "head" it seems reasonable to conclude that she is not responsible if he does not listen to her. In particular, she should not strive with him or get into dispute or disagreement with him on this point. Rather it would seem that she is enjoined to submit to him in all that is according to the Word of God and to pray for Yahweh to show him his error.

In this regard it is important to take account of the fact that "a house divided against itself cannot stand" as discussed in section 52, page 149. Therefore a situation in which the wife is striving against the husband opens the house to division and destruction. This is not to say that the wife should accept or agree to participate in unGodly or unscriptural actions but it does seem to suggest that she should not continuously argue with and oppose her husband in a manner which exacerbates the division. It would seem that she should rather apply the principles of 1 Corinthians 13 regarding Love.

This thought is supported by 1 Corinthians 14:34-36 which states:

34 Let your women keep silent in the churches, for they are not permitted to speak; but they are to be submissive, as the law also says.

35 And if they want to learn something, let them ask their own husbands at home; for it is shameful for women to speak in church.

36 Or did the word of God come originally from you? Or was it you only that it reached? (NKJ)

Again this is a difficult scripture but it is certainly in the "New Testament".

1 Peter 3:1-7 states:

1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.

3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward-- arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--

4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,

6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.

7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (NKJ)

While the idea of a wife calling her husband "Lord" in this day and age may seem extremely offensive to most, it is nevertheless scriptural. What would appear to be more important than the use of the Word "Lord" however, is that which is in the "hidden person of the heart" and the conduct of the wife whereby even if the husband does not obey the Word of God he may be won by the conduct of his wives.

Furthermore, this scripture reinforces the impact of a divided house by exhorting husbands to dwell with their wives with "understanding" that "your prayers may not be hindered". From personal experience, if a man and his wife are not in agreement their prayers and daily activities will be constantly obstructed or hindered and they will suffer great loss as a consequence of spiritual forces which are mobilized against them as a consequence of division. This same hindering will occur where a man is joined to another woman with whom he is not living. This will apply to previous wives, mistresses, prostitutes or any other woman that he has joined himself to and with whom he has a "one flesh" bond that has not been cut off. We have repeatedly witnessed this phenomenon in people we have ministered to.

54. THE LOVE BETWEEN HUSBAND AND WIVES (AN EXTENSION OF EPHESIANS 5:33)

At this point, there are still many aspects of the marriage relationship which have not been dealt with, in this section we will seek to better understand the full implications of scripture with regard to the intimate aspects of the relationship between husband and wives.

a. A WIFE SHOULD REVERENCE HER HUSBAND

Ephesians 5:33 states:

33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife [wives] as himself, and let the wife [wives] see that she respects her husband. (NKJ)

(the word [wives] added by the author)

The Amplified Bible states:

33 However, let each man of you (without exception) love his wife [wives] as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband -- that she notices him, regards him, honours him, prefers him, venerates and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and lives and admires him exceedingly. (AMP)

(the word [wives] added by the author)

Interestingly, husbands are told to agapao (love) their wives while wives are told to reverence their husbands. Some years ago, The Lord led me to Dake's commentary on Ephesians 5:33 which states the following with regard to the word reverence:

Greek phobeo, to strike with fear; to frighten. It is translated reverence only here; be afraid 29 times; and fear 61 times (Revelation 1:17; 2:10, etc). She is to reverence him as her head (verses 23-24; 1 Corinthians 11:3)

This is certainly a very difficult statistic to assimilate and apply, it makes more sense in the context that we are told to reverence or fear God, this is a Godly respect, awe or fear NOT a Satanic terror as the word fear has come to mean in English. Nevertheless, this is a difficult scripture to fully comprehend within our paradigm of marriage and must surely emphasise the need for Christian husbands to be Godly men who fear God for it may be that it is only if a man fears God that his wife can feel secure to reverence him. Such is the total collapse of our society from true Bible based values that most Christian women would probably find it almost inconceivable that they should reverence their husbands as this interpretation implies that they must. But, nevertheless, that is what the Word of God says and both men and women should seek for this ideal. At the same time it reinforces the view that a man who is not committed to this ideal is not the man that a sincere Christian woman should choose as a husband. She would surely be far better advised being the second or subsequent wife of a man who truly is committed to seeking God to change him to become more like Jesus so that his wives can submit to and reverence him with ease.

1 Peter 3:1-7 states:

1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,

2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear.

3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward-- arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel--

4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.

5 For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,

6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, whose daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any terror.

7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife [wives], as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered. (NKJ)

(the word [wives] added by the author)

Clearly there is a deep love and reverence implied on the part of the wife against the Love of God manifest in the husband.

b. THE DESIRE OF A WIFE SHOULD BE FOR HER HUSBAND

Genesis 3:13-16 reads:

13 And the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."

14 So the LORD God said to the serpent: "Because you have done this, you are cursed more than all cattle, and more than every beast of the field; on your belly you shall go, and you shall eat dust all the days of your life.

15 And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her Seed; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise His heel."

16 To the woman He said: "I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." (NKJ)

c. SPOUSES SHOULD NOT WITHOLD FROM ONE ANOTHER SEXUALLY

***##

1 Cor 7:1-5

1 Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.

2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.

3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

(NKJ)

d. A WIFE SHOULD BE UNINHIBITED IN HER RELATIONSHIP WITH HER HUSBAND

By implication of the points in section 54.a, page 151 taking account of Genesis 3:16 which states that the desire of the wife should be for her husband, it seems apparent that the wife should love her husband in a very deep sense, second only to Jesus and also that she should have an intense desire for him.

Arguably love-making in marriage is a type and shadow of praise and worship and, by implication, the wife should take the initiative and love making should be unihibited (consider David's praise and worship in 2 Samuel 6:12-23:

12 Now it was told King David, saying, "The LORD has blessed the house of Obed-Edom and all that belongs to him, because of the ark of God." So David went and brought up the ark of God from the house of Obed-Edom to the City of David with gladness.

13 And so it was, when those bearing the ark of the LORD had gone six paces, that he sacrificed oxen and fatted sheep.

14 Then David danced before the LORD with all his might; and David was wearing a linen ephod.

15 So David and all the house of Israel brought up the ark of the LORD with shouting and with the sound of the trumpet.

16 Now as the ark of the LORD came into the City of David, Michal, Saul's daughter, looked through a window and saw King David leaping and whirling before the LORD; and she despised him in her heart.

17 So they brought the ark of the LORD, and set it in its place in the midst of the tabernacle that David had erected for it. Then David offered burnt offerings and peace offerings before the LORD.

18 And when David had finished offering burnt offerings and peace offerings, he blessed the people in the name of the LORD of hosts.

19 Then he distributed among all the people, among the whole multitude of Israel, both the women and the men, to everyone a loaf of bread, a piece of meat, and a cake of raisins. So all the people departed, everyone to his house.

20 Then David returned to bless his household. And Michal the daughter of Saul came out to meet David, and said, "How glorious was the king of Israel today, uncovering himself today in the eyes of the maids of his servants, as one of the base fellows shamelessly uncovers himself!"

21 So David said to Michal, "It was before the LORD, who chose me instead of your father and all his house, to appoint me ruler over the people of the LORD, over Israel. Therefore I will play music before the LORD.

22 "And I will be even more undignified than this, and will be humble in my own sight. But as for the maidservants of whom you have spoken, by them I will be held in honor."

23 Therefore Michal the daughter of Saul had no children to the day of her death. (NKJ)

Here we see perhaps the ultimate example of uninhibited praise and worship of God by David, "a man after God's own heart" (Acts 13:22). Does this not indicate that a wife should be uninhibited in the manner in which she makes love to her husband?

Do we not find from careful consideration of all we may know about praise and worship that God requires us to come to Him to worship Him, He is there, always ready and waiting to receive our worship, if we will but come to Him. Does not experience with praise and worship teach us that it is only when we lose sight of those around us and worship God with all our hearts, all our minds, all our soul and all our strength that we really come into His presence? Surely it is the same in the wife's role in marriage?

e. A WIFE SHOULD BE SKILLED AND TAKE THE INITIATIVE IN LOVE MAKING

Esther 2:1-18 records:

1 After these things, when the wrath of King Ahasuerus subsided, he remembered Vashti, what she had done, and what had been decreed against her.

2 Then the king's servants who attended him said: "Let beautiful young virgins be sought for the king;

3 "and let the king appoint officers in all the provinces of his kingdom, that they may gather all the beautiful young virgins to Shushan the citadel, into the women's quarters, under the custody of Hegai the king's eunuch, custodian of the women. And let beauty preparations be given them.

4 "Then let the young woman who pleases the king be queen instead of Vashti." This thing pleased the king, and he did so.

5 In Shushan the citadel there was a certain Jew whose name was Mordecai the son of Jair, the son of Shimei, the son of Kish, a Benjamite.

6 Kish had been carried away from Jerusalem with the captives who had been captured with Jeconiah king of Judah, whom Nebuchadnezzar the king of Babylon had carried away.

7 And Mordecai had brought up Hadassah, that is, Esther, his uncle's daughter, for she had neither father nor mother. The young woman was lovely and beautiful. When her father and mother died, Mordecai took her as his own daughter.

8 So it was, when the king's command and decree were heard, and when many young women were gathered at Shushan the citadel, under the custody of Hegai, that Esther also was taken to the king's palace, into the care of Hegai the custodian of the women.

9 Now the young woman pleased him, and she obtained his favor; so he readily gave beauty preparations to her, besides her allowance. Then seven choice maidservants were provided for her from the king's palace, and he moved her and her maidservants to the best place in the house of the women.

10 Esther had not revealed her people or family, for Mordecai had charged her not to reveal it.

11 And every day Mordecai paced in front of the court of the women's quarters, to learn of Esther's welfare and what was happening to her.

12 Each young woman's turn came to go in to King Ahasuerus after she had completed twelve months' preparation, according to the regulations for the women, for thus were the days of their preparation apportioned: six months with oil of myrrh, and six months with perfumes and preparations for beautifying women.

13 Thus prepared, each young woman went to the king, and she was given whatever she desired to take with her from the women's quarters to the king's palace.

14 In the evening she went, and in the morning she returned to the second house of the women, to the custody of Shaashgaz, the king's eunuch who kept the concubines. She would not go in to the king again unless the king delighted in her and called for her by name.

15 Now when the turn came for Esther the daughter of Abihail the uncle of Mordecai, who had taken her as his daughter, to go in to the king, she requested nothing but what Hegai the king's eunuch, the custodian of the women, advised. And Esther obtained favor in the sight of all who saw her.

16 So Esther was taken to King Ahasuerus, into his royal palace, in the tenth month, which is the month of Tebeth, in the seventh year of his reign.

17 The king loved Esther more than all the other women, and she obtained grace and favor in his sight more than all the virgins; so he set the royal crown upon her head and made her queen instead of Vashti.

18 Then the king made a great feast, the Feast of Esther, for all his officials and servants; and he proclaimed a holiday in the provinces and gave gifts according to the generosity of a king. (NKJ)

At the risk of offending you, let me point out a few aspects of this story:

i. Esther waited at least a year to go to King Ahasuerus.

ii. Therefore King Ahasuerus had at least 365 concubines BEFORE Esther.

iii. Esther only had one night to please the King and therefore be in the place that God intended her to be in order to deliver her people.

iv. If Esther had not distinguished herself in some notable way during the night that she was with the King she would have gone to the house of the concubines and never been sent for again and she would not likely be the subject of a book of the Bible!

v. Esther only took with her to her night with the King that which was recommended, in other words by implication she took less than most of those who went before her.

vi. It seems safe to assume that since the women went to the King as virgins and left as concubines, that he had sexual intercourse with each and every one of them.

vii. Therefore we must surely conclude that Esther was particularly pleasing to the King not only in terms of her beauty, personallity and intellect but also in terms of her sexual responsiveness and initiative in pleasing him?

From this can we not at least partially conclude that God intended woman to be uninibited sexually in pleasing her husband? We can at least safely conclude that the King did not feel obliged to coach each of his concubines personally until their sexual performance was pleasing to him. Surely there is a message to be gleaned from this storey which correlates with the experience of the world with men constantly seeking a woman who will make uninhibited love to them and take the initiative, as evidenced in so much secular writing and pornography. Is the church not in error if it teaches young women that it is the husband's responsibility to make love to them? Surely they must "praise and worship" their husbands through their uninhibited love making?

Esther 4:12-14, relating to the situation following the edict to destroy the Jews, states:

12 So they told Mordecai Esther's words.

13 Then Mordecai told them to answer Esther: "Do not think in your heart that you will escape in the king's palace any more than all the other Jews.

14 "For if you remain completely silent at this time, relief and deliverance will arise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father's house will perish. Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" (NKJ)

From this can we not conclude that Yahweh specifically created this opportunity so that Esther came to the kingdom to deliver her people from Satan's plans to destroy the Jews in some way or another. Furthermore, one school of thought seems to suggest that King Cyrus of Persia who ordered the rebuilding of the temple in Jerusalem in Ezra 1:1-4 was the daughter of Queen Esther and King Ahasuerus:

1 Now in the first year of Cyrus king of Persia, that the word of the LORD by the mouth of Jeremiah might be fulfilled, the LORD stirred up the spirit of Cyrus king of Persia, so that he made a proclamation throughout all his kingdom, and also put it in writing, saying,

2 Thus says Cyrus king of Persia: All the kingdoms of the earth the LORD God of heaven has given me. And He has commanded me to build Him a house at Jerusalem which is in Judah.

3 Who is among you of all His people? May his God be with him, and let him go up to Jerusalem which is in Judah, and build the house of the LORD God of Israel (He is God), which is in Jerusalem.

4 And whoever is left in any place where he dwells, let the men of his place help him with silver and gold, with goods and livestock, besides the freewill offerings for the house of God which is in Jerusalem. (NKJ)

While this is uncertain at this time it does seem to make some degree of sense, the timing of the seventy years from the start of exile would be about right for Cyrus to be the son of Esther.

Irrespective of whether this is the case, the fact is that Esther did, indeed, come to the kingdom for that time to deliver her people and it seems certain that Yahweh arranged matters such that this would be the case. In this case we must surely conclude that Yahweh quite deliberately permitted a situation to develop whereby Esther came to be queen, at least in part because of the manner in which she made love to the King! And since God created man and woman as sexual beings and created their sexual potential, must we not also conclude that He intended the sexual experience between husband and wives to be the most sublime experience possible and one which permits them to reach their full sexual potential. Surely the sexual potential which is so massively abused in pornography was created by God to be used in the marriage chamber?

If this is the case, is it any wonder that men turn to harlots and desert wives who are sexually inhibited and expect the man to take the initiative and make love to the woman? Is that not the sexual framework that the church in fact teaches - the man should worship the woman, not the other way round? It seems that way to me, perhaps your experience has been different?

f. THE HUSBAND MUST SEEK TO BECOME LIKE JESUS

The above conclusions are all good and well, but they are difficult for a wife to put into practice with a husband who consorts with harlots, idolizes the national rugby team, cricket team, tennis players, pastor and others and devotes little or no time to the Word of God and seeking to dwell with her with understanding. It is apparent that the conduct of the husband is not a precondition for the conduct of the wife, 1 Peter 3:1 makes this quite clear. But it also should make it quite clear to any God fearing Christian woman who is currently unmarried in the sight of God, whether she is a virgin, a widow or one whom God has permitted to divorce, that she should not think of getting married to any man that she is not one hundred percent certain is the man that God has chosen for her. Furthermore, it should be clear from all that has preceeded this section that the question of whether or not he is married should not be a consideration. In fact, if he has one or more wives who can testify that he is indeed a husband who can love her in the manner that she has been designed by God to need, this should be a recommendation.

55. THE IMPLICATIONS OF ISAIAH 4:1

Isaiah 4:1, quoted in section 9, page 33 states:

1 And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, "We will eat our own food and wear our own apparel; only let us be called by your name, to take away our reproach."

Surely, insofar as there are increasing indications that there is enormous tribulation, persecution and hardship imminent for the church throughout the world, it is now time for men to accept their God given responsibility to care for those women who are in the Body of Christ but unmarried? Surely it is time for women to renounce their heretical claims to solely own their husbands and to reach out in agape love to those who are without a husband and offer to extend the covering of their husbands to them?

I can find no scripture to convince me otherwise and I must suggest to any person who finds this suggestion offensive that they should re-examine their heart towards the Word of God! IF GOD IS REALLY FIRST IN YOUR LIFE, how can you refuse what He has foretold in Isaiah 4:1?

It has been suggested to me that this is not "God's best". How do we presume to know God's best when we do not accept His Word? Consider that it is widely accepted that seven (7) is regarded as the scriptural number of completeness and / or perfection. There are seven churches in Revelation 1, there are Seven Spirits of God in Revelation 1; 3; 4 and 5, there are seven lamps in Revelation 4:5 and seven lamps to the lampstand in the tabernacle in Exodus 25:37; 37:23; Numbers 8:2 and Zechariah 4:2, the Sabbath is the seventh day (Exodus 31:15 and numerous others), etc. Surely it would be presumptious to suggest that Yahweh does not place particular significance in the number seven. Consider therefore why he would designate through Isaiah that there would be seven women to one man if this was also not something that He considered important?

Consider equally that six (6) is the number of man and carnallity.

Revelation 13:18 states:

Here is wisdom. Let him who has understanding calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man: His number is 666. (NKJ)

Surely if Yahweh considered more than one wife to not be His "best" He would have specified six instead of seven in Isaiah 4:1, thereby warning us that this was something of man that He did not really approve of? Surely He is able to arrange matters to ensure that this would be the situation? Surely we must conclude that Yahweh is telling us that there is something we do not know? That possibly marital perfection could lie in the same perfect number as He has designed so many other things to harmonize around?

Incidentally there is significant management and presentation theory that would suggest that the optimum number of direct report subordinates to a manager for maximum effectiveness is about seven! Praendex Incorporated, a human resource company in the United States which offers a personallity profiling tool classifies eight major personallity profile types. It seems to me that there may be an implication that a family of a man and seven wives might optimally embody one member from each classification with each family member being uniquely equipped to perform a specific role, some being extrovert and others task oriented, some fast paced and others calm and methodical, some assertive and some cooperative, some detail focussed and others more interested in the broad brush strokes of the "big picture". If these same eight people represented a diversity of intellectual and technical interest, is it not possible that such a family unit could live together in harmony while at the same time complementing one another to such an extent that the family unit would be capable of great achievements. Is it not possible that a man supported by such a team of wives could be highly effective in serving God? I don't know! But since Yahweh uses the number seven in Isaiah 4:1 it seems to me that if we truly trust His wisdom as being infinitely greater than ours we should surely not exclude the possibility that He has designed us with this in mind?

On a slightly different note, some years ago I was praying about this subject and the Lord clearly indicated to me that many of His servants would not have fallen if they had had several wives interceding for them and they would also not have been nearly as susceptible to being snared by a harlot or adulteress as has been the case with several prominent Christian personalities. In the spiritual context there are also a variety of spiritual gifts, just as there are a variety of personallity traits. Consequently it seems possible that a man married to seven women selected by Yahweh would find himself in a family unit with the appropriate combination of spiritual gifts to support him in his ministry.

It would certainly seem that a family unit such as this would never face the prospect of any member feeling lonely and not having any one to talk to, the problem of who to talk to when the husband was away on business would simply not arise. Equally, the variety of interactions would be such that the likelihood of any member of the family unit becoming bored would be minimal. Reasonably different wives would also have different physical attributes and recreational interests with the overall effect that there would likely be absolutely no likelihood of any member looking outside the marriage for companionship, friendship, etc - the unmet needs which so often result in a spouse going outside a marriage in a monogamous situation.

Overall, while you may regard the above as being highly speculative, it does seem that there are good grounds to expect that God knows better than we do and therefore this is not beyond the bounds of possibility. Should we not therefore conclude that a man complemented by seven wives selected by Yahweh to complement and complete him in every area of his personallity, skills AND calling will be a formidable force for the Kingdom of God? Is it not possible that the heart of man AND woman seek this completeness resulting in the constant tide of dissatisfaction and "divorce" which characterises so many monogomous marriages?

56. HUSBAND'S AS THE PRIMARY SOURCE OF FELLOWSHIP FOR THEIR WIVES

There is a body of social thinking which is frequently espoused by the church to the effect that it is the responsibility of the husband to provide fellowship to his wife. It is further suggested that a husband who works long hours or is away from home on business on a regular basis is not fulfilling his obligations to his wife and children. It seems to me that if you carefully consider all the scriptures that you have read thus far you will see that this does not appear to be a scriptural requirement and, in fact, when translated into a set of criteria against which the acceptability of a husband is measured, is entirely contrary to scripture. The sections that follow examine a number of specific cases:

a. ACCEPTABLE WORKING HOURS

There seems to be an almost universal view in the Christian community in which I live that appears to state that a man who spends more than eight hours a day at work is incompetent and that a husband who works twelve hours a day has something seriously wrong with him to a point where one gains the impression that many people would seem to consider that to be grounds for serious objection, if not divorce.

Consider Matthew 20:1-16 (Jesus speaking):

1 "For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard.

2 "Now when he had agreed with the laborers for a denarius a day, he sent them into his vineyard.

3 "And he went out about the third hour and saw others standing idle in the marketplace,

4 "and said to them, 'You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right I will give you.' So they went.

5 "Again he went out about the sixth and the ninth hour, and did likewise.

6 "And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing idle, and said to them, 'Why have you been standing here idle all day?'

7 "They said to him, 'Because no one hired us.' He said to them, 'You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right you will receive.'

8 "So when evening had come, the owner of the vineyard said to his steward, 'Call the laborers and give them their wages, beginning with the last to the first.'

9 "And when those came who were hired about the eleventh hour, they each received a denarius.

10 "But when the first came, they supposed that they would receive more; and they likewise received each a denarius.

11 "And when they had received it, they complained against the landowner,

12 "saying, 'These last men have worked only one hour, and you made them equal to us who have borne the burden and the heat of the day.'

13 "But he answered one of them and said, 'Friend, I am doing you no wrong. Did you not agree with me for a denarius?

14 'Take what is yours and go your way. I wish to give to this last man the same as to you.

15 'Is it not lawful for me to do what I wish with my own things? Or is your eye evil because I am good?'

16 "So the last will be first, and the first last. For many are called, but few chosen." (NKJ)

It is important to note that Jesus is telling this parable as an indication of the fact that length of service alone does not afford a believer any greater reward in the Kingdom of Heaven.

In modern day terms the land owner in the parable went out early in the morning, presumably at close to sunrise which in Israel would be approximately 06h00 and recruited labourers, he returned about the third hour of the day (09h00), the sixth hour of the day (12h00, midday), the ninth hour (15h00, 3 in the afternoon) and the eleventh hour (17h00, 5 in the afternoon) and in the evening, one hour after the eleventh hour, that is 18h00 (6 in the evening) he paid them off. In other words, the first casual workers were in the market place seeking work not later than six in the morning and they were paid off at six in the evening having worked a full twelve hour day.

It seems likely that they left their homes not later than about 05h30 or perhaps 05h45 to arrive at the market in time to be hired and that they returned home not earlier than 18h15 if not 18h30 having been away from home for at least twelve and a half hours. If we take account of the custom of the men assembling at the gate of the city it is possible that they may have assembled at the gate of the city for a while before returning home.

Furthermore, scripture quite clearly instructs us that we are to work six days of the week:

Consider Exodus 20:8-11:

8 "Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.

9 Six days you shall labor and do all your work,

10 but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the LORD your God. In it you shall do no work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your male servant, nor your female servant, nor your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates.

11 For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and hallowed it. (NKJ)

Exodus 23:12:

12 "Six days you shall do your work, and on the seventh day you shall rest, that your ox and your donkey may rest, and the son of your female servant and the stranger may be refreshed. (NKJ)

Exodus 34:21:

21 "Six days you shall work, but on the seventh day you shall rest; in plowing time and in harvest you shall rest. (NKJ)

Leviticus 23:3:

3 'Six days shall work be done, but the seventh day is a Sabbath of solemn rest, a holy convocation. You shall do no work on it; it is the Sabbath of the LORD in all your dwellings. (NKJ)

Deuteronomy 5:13-14:

13 Six days you shall labor and do all your work,

14 but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the LORD your God. In it you shall not do any work: you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your manservant, nor your maidservant, nor your ox, nor your donkey, nor any of your cattle, nor your stranger who is within your gates, that your manservant and your maidservant may rest as well as you. (NKJ)

Luke 13:14:

14 But the ruler of the synagogue answered with indignation, because Jesus had healed on the Sabbath; and he said to the crowd, "There are six days on which men ought to work; therefore come and be healed on them, and not on the Sabbath day." (NKJ)

Can there be any doubt that Yahweh intended man to work a 72 hour working week as opposed to the 40 hour working week which is regarded as acceptable today? This being the case, is it not reasonable to conclude that a man who works about 72 hours a week is not necessarily out of the will of God and is therefore not in any way neglecting his scriptural responsibilities to his family? Does this not necessitate a rethink of the role of husband and wife which may well be influenced by a domestic arrangement in which an extended family, including parents and grandparents but also additional wives, collectively provide the fellowship and logistical support to the husband.

If we take account of the description of a virtuous wife in Proverb 31, discussed in section 42, page 126, then it seems apparent that the role of the husband is not necessarily as a bread winner either. He has tasks to perform which have much to do with defending his family and participating in the government of his community AND doing the work of the Lord!

It is particularly interesting to recall Genesis 2:18 at this point:

18 And the LORD God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." (NKJ)

1 Corintians 11:8-9 confirms this:

8 For man is not from woman, but woman from man.

9 Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man. (NKJ)

Surely from this we must conclude that woman was created to help man and that man was not created to provide fellowship and companionship and support for woman? Surely scripture teaches us that a man and his wives are an integrated, harmonious team working together for the overall good of the family in accomplishing what God has called the family unit, through the husband, to accomplish as their calling. Surely we must conclude that God intended the wives to provide fellowship and support to their husband AND to one another rather than requiring the husband to provide fellowship to his wives. This does not in any way imply that the husband should sit back and be waited on by his wives, but it does require that he busy's himself with the work that God has given him to do both in the Kingdom of God and in his secular occupation while his wives support him by running the household and to some measure the household enterprises which do not require interaction with other men or that they travel away from the household.

b. HUSBAND'S WHO ARE REGULARLY AWAY FROM HOME

It is not uncommon to hear message preached which have the effect of suggesting that a husband who is regularly away from home is not necessarily in the will of God since the family is God's plan for man. Let us consider what scripture has to say about this.

2 Samuel 11:1-5 reports:

1 It happened in the spring of the year, at the time when kings go out to battle, that David sent Joab and his servants with him, and all Israel; and they destroyed the people of Ammon and besieged Rabbah. But David remained at Jerusalem.

2 Then it happened one evening that David arose from his bed and walked on the roof of the king's house. And from the roof he saw a woman bathing, and the woman was very beautiful to behold.

3 So David sent and inquired about the woman. And someone said, "Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?"

4 Then David sent messengers, and took her; and she came to him, and he lay with her, for she was cleansed from her impurity; and she returned to her house.

5 And the woman conceived; so she sent and told David, and said, "I am with child." (NKJ)

1 Chronicles 20:1 confirms this:

1 It happened in the spring of the year, at the time kings go out to battle, that Joab led out the armed forces and ravaged the country of the people of Ammon, and came and besieged Rabbah. But David stayed at Jerusalem. And Joab defeated Rabbah and overthrew it. (NKJ)

It is clear that it was a frequent occurence for kings and their armies to go out to battle. There are teachings which suggest that it was common for kings to go out to war for about six months every year. I have on several occassions heard messages preached about David's error in taking his ease at home and not going out to battle and then on other occassions the same preachers preach against husbands who do not devote sufficient time to the wives and families. Let us consider some other scriptures:

1 Samuel 11:7 records regarding Saul:

7 So he took a yoke of oxen and cut them in pieces, and sent them throughout all the territory of Israel by the hands of messengers, saying, "Whoever does not go out with Saul and Samuel to battle, so it shall be done to his oxen." And the fear of the LORD fell on the people, and they came out with one consent. (NKJ)

Joshua 1:11-16 records:

11 "Pass through the camp and command the people, saying, 'Prepare provisions for yourselves, for within three days you will cross over this Jordan, to go in to possess the land which the LORD your God is giving you to possess.'"

12 And to the Reubenites, the Gadites, and half the tribe of Manasseh Joshua spoke, saying,

13 "Remember the word which Moses the servant of the LORD commanded you, saying, 'The LORD your God is giving you rest and is giving you this land.'

14 "Your wives, your little ones, and your livestock shall remain in the land which Moses gave you on this side of the Jordan. But you shall pass before your brethren armed, all your mighty men of valor, and help them,

15 "until the LORD has given your brethren rest, as He gave you, and they also have taken possession of the land which the LORD your God is giving them. Then you shall return to the land of your possession and enjoy it, which Moses the LORD'S servant gave you on this side of the Jordan toward the sunrise."

16 And they answered Joshua, saying, "All that you command us we will do, and wherever you send us we will go. (NKJ)

Here we see the Reubenites, the Gadites, and half the tribe of Manasseh being expressly commanded by God's anointed leader in the name of God to leave their families, probably for several years. By implication we also see the women mandated to run family affairs in the absence of their husbands, keep in mind that Joshua and Caleb were the only men over forty years old who came out of the wilderness so there were not even any grandfathers to assist the women to raise their children, look after the livestock and run the farms!

1 Corinthians 9:5 states:

5 Do we have no right to take along a believing wife, as do also the other apostles, the brothers of the Lord, and Cephas? (NKJ)

Surely this clearly indicates that a man is entitled to take one or more of his wives with him on his travels and, by implication, to leave other wives at home to look after his domestic affairs?

Mark 10:29-31 records:

29 So Jesus answered and said, "Assuredly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or lands, for My sake and the gospel's,

30 "who shall not receive a hundredfold now in this time-- houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and lands, with persecutions-- and in the age to come, eternal life.

31 "But many who are first will be last, and the last first." (NKJ)

Here we see our Lord and Saviour Himself saying that it is acceptable for a man to leave his house and family to serve God if God so requires it. This report is confirmed in Matthew 19:29 and also in Luke 18:29. Jesus does NOT indicate that a wife should leave her husband. It is hard to envisage that this entails a man abandoning his family but it is relatively easy to envisage that this entails a man leaving for foreign fields for many years at a time with little or no contact with his family and his family having to fend for themselves.

Genesis 37:12-17 states:

12 Then his brothers went to feed their father's flock in Shechem.

13 And Israel said to Joseph, "Are not your brothers feeding the flock in Shechem? Come, I will send you to them." So he said to him, "Here I am."

14 Then he said to him, "Please go and see if it is well with your brothers and well with the flocks, and bring back word to me." So he sent him out of the Valley of Hebron, and he went to Shechem.

15 Now a certain man found him, and there he was, wandering in the field. And the man asked him, saying, "What are you seeking?"

16 So he said, "I am seeking my brothers. Please tell me where they are feeding their flocks."

17 And the man said, "They have departed from here, for I heard them say, 'Let us go to Dothan.'" So Joseph went after his brothers and found them in Dothan. (NKJ)

Here we see a clear example of men taken away from home on a regular and lengthy period in order to attend to their business affairs, in this case looking after the sheep.

Luke 2:8-20 records regarding the birth of Jesus:

8 Now there were in the same country shepherds living out in the fields, keeping watch over their flock by night.

9 And behold, an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid.

10 Then the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people.

11 "For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.

12 "And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger."

13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying:

14 "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, goodwill toward men!"

15 So it was, when the angels had gone away from them into heaven, that the shepherds said to one another, "Let us now go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has come to pass, which the Lord has made known to us."

16 And they came with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the Babe lying in a manger.

17 Now when they had seen Him, they made widely known the saying which was told them concerning this Child.

18 And all those who heard it marveled at those things which were told them by the shepherds.

19 But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart.

20 Then the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told them. (NKJ)

In our society much is made at "Christmas" with regard to the shepherds keeping watch over their flocks by night in the fields - with the implication that they were not at home with their families and were probably away from home most of the time, particularly when they had to travel further afield in search of grazing.

Thus we see throughout scripture that it was common place for men to travel away from home on business or the Lords work for months or years at a time and that many times this was as a consequence of a commandment of the Lord through those He had designated to lead the people. Surely we must conclude that the continuous presence of the husband at home, as much as it is desirable and pleasant for both husband and family, is not a scriptural prerequisite for a marriage to succeed and is certainly NOT a basis for a wife to entertain adultery or divorce. In fact, to the contrary, we Proverbs we see this specific situation addressed:

Proverbs 7:1-27 states:

1 My son, keep my words, and treasure my commands within you.

2 Keep my commands and live, and my law as the apple of your eye.

3 Bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart.

4 Say to wisdom, "You are my sister," and call understanding your nearest kin,

5 That they may keep you from the immoral woman, from the seductress who flatters with her words.

6 For at the window of my house I looked through my lattice,

7 And saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, a young man devoid of understanding,

8 Passing along the street near her corner; and he took the path to her house

9 In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night.

10 And there a woman met him, with the attire of a harlot, and a crafty heart.

11 She was loud and rebellious, her feet would not stay at home.

12 At times she was outside, at times in the open square, Lurking at every corner.

13 So she caught him and kissed him; with an impudent face she said to him:

14 "I have peace offerings with me; today I have paid my vows.

15 So I came out to meet you, diligently to seek your face, and I have found you.

16 I have spread my bed with tapestry, Colored coverings of Egyptian linen.

17 I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon.

18 Come, let us take our fill of love until morning; let us delight ourselves with love.

19 For my husband is not at home; he has gone on a long journey;

20 He has taken a bag of money with him, and will come home on the appointed day."

21 With her enticing speech she caused him to yield, with her flattering lips she seduced him.

22 Immediately he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as a fool to the correction of the stocks,

23 Till an arrow struck his liver. As a bird hastens to the snare, he did not know it would cost his life.

24 Now therefore, listen to me, my children; pay attention to the words of my mouth:

25 Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, do not stray into her paths;

26 For she has cast down many wounded, and all who were slain by her were strong men.

27 Her house is the way to hell, descending to the chambers of death. (NKJ)

Here we clearly see that this women has resorted to adultery because her husband has gone on a long journey and that this one chance liaison with adultery commits this young man to hell as discussed in more detail in section 11, page 37.

I urge all readers to consider carefully the implications of their current beliefs in this area. We may not like the implications but if our objective is to store up treasure in heaven

Mark 10:21 reports:

21 Then Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, "One thing you lack: Go your way, sell whatever you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, take up the cross, and follow Me." (NKJ)

This is confirmed in Matthew 19:21 and Luke 18:22. Likewize, if we desire to hear those words "Well done, good and faithful servant" we must surely revise our thinking on many of these issues.

Matthew 25:1-34 reports Jesus as saying:

1 "Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.

2 "Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish.

3 "Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them,

4 "but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.

5 "But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept.

6 "And at midnight a cry was heard: 'Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!'

7 "Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps.

8 "And the foolish said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.'

9 "But the wise answered, saying, 'No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.'

10 "And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut.

11 "Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, 'Lord, Lord, open to us!'

12 "But he answered and said, 'Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.'

13 "Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.

14 "For the kingdom of heaven is like a man traveling to a far country, who called his own servants and delivered his goods to them.

15 "And to one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, to each according to his own ability; and immediately he went on a journey.

16 "Then he who had received the five talents went and traded with them, and made another five talents.

17 "And likewise he who had received two gained two more also.

18 "But he who had received one went and dug in the ground, and hid his lord's money.

19 "After a long time the lord of those servants came and settled accounts with them.

20 "So he who had received five talents came and brought five other talents, saying, 'Lord, you delivered to me five talents; look, I have gained five more talents besides them.'

21 "His lord said to him, 'Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.'

22 "He also who had received two talents came and said, 'Lord, you delivered to me two talents; look, I have gained two more talents besides them.'

23 "His lord said to him, 'Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.'

24 "Then he who had received the one talent came and said, 'Lord, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you have not sown, and gathering where you have not scattered seed.

25 'And I was afraid, and went and hid your talent in the ground. Look, there you have what is yours.'

26 "But his lord answered and said to him, 'You wicked and lazy servant, you knew that I reap where I have not sown, and gather where I have not scattered seed.

27 'So you ought to have deposited my money with the bankers, and at my coming I would have received back my own with interest.

28 'Therefore take the talent from him, and give it to him who has ten talents.

29 'For to everyone who has, more will be given, and he will have abundance; but from him who does not have, even what he has will be taken away.

30 'And cast the unprofitable servant into the outer darkness. There will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.'

31 "When the Son of Man comes in His glory, and all the holy angels with Him, then He will sit on the throne of His glory.

32 "All the nations will be gathered before Him, and He will separate them one from another, as a shepherd divides his sheep from the goats.

33 "And He will set the sheep on His right hand, but the goats on the left.

34 "Then the King will say to those on His right hand, 'Come, you blessed of My Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: (NKJ)

Luke 19:17 repeats the story of the faithful servants. Is it not interesting that the parable of the foolish and faithful servants is juxtaposed with the parable of the ten virgins? Surely we must take account of the prospect of being cast into outer darkness which accompanies both parables. Surely any person who has access to the Bible today in such a diversity of translations must see themselves as a person to whom many talents of knowledge have been entrusted. Dare we be like the foolish servant who buries the truth in the ground and refuses to acknowledge and broadcast that truth to those who need it. I challenge every person who reads this book to ask themselves whether they can hope to ignore the implications of the scriptures contained herein and think for a moment that they will not face the most severe judgment foretold in the passage above!

57. BETROTHAL

In our society an engagement to be married is an occassion for rejoicing. But increasingly it is regarded as one further tentative step towards determining whether the proposed spouse is, indeed, the ultimate life partner. The person who will meet all expectations and with whom it can be expected that one can live "happily ever after". However, the prospect of breaking off an engagement has, over time, become less and less daunting till today, it would appear, that many young people regard an engagement as something experimental.

Can we determine from scripture whether this practice is, in fact, scriptural and, if it is scriptural what it's significance is?

To start with, let us consider Matthew 1:18-25:

18 Now the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows: After His mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Spirit.

19 Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put her away secretly.

20 But while he thought about these things, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, "Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take to you Mary your wife, for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit.

21 "And she will bring forth a Son, and you shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins."

22 So all this was done that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the Lord through the prophet, saying:

23 "Behold, the virgin shall be with child, and bear a Son, and they shall call His name Immanuel," which is translated, "God with us."

24 Then Joseph, being aroused from sleep, did as the angel of the Lord commanded him and took to him his wife,

25 and did not know her till she had brought forth her firstborn Son. And he called His name Jesus. (NKJ)

In considering this scripture it is important that we recall the previous discussion with regard to the word "gune" signifying wife, wives, woman and women in section 39, page 112. From consideration of the explanation in this section it is apparent that the use of the term wife in this passage could just as well read betrothed woman or unmarried woman according to context. Accordingly, there is no basis to allege that a betrothed woman is the wife of a man.

Likewise, the word "husband" in Matthew 1:19 does not in fact describe a marital state. This word in the Greek is "aner", Strong's number 435 of which Thayer says:

435 aner-

1) with reference to sex

a) used of a male

b) used of a husband

c) used of a betrothed or future husband

2) with reference to age, and to distinguish an adult man from a boy

3) any male

4) used generically of a group of both men and women

Further references with regard to the word "aner" are presented in Appendix J, page 266, 268.

The word translated "betrothed" in Matthew 1:18 is the word "mnesteuo", Strong's number 3423 which Strong defines as follows:

3423 mnesteuo (mnace-tyoo'-o);

from a derivative of 3415; to give a souvenier (engagement present), i.e. betroth:

KJV-- espouse.

Thus it appears that betrothal is associated with the giving of a gift. The Lamsa translation of Matthew 1:18 makes this much clearer:

18 The birth of Jesus Christ was in this manner. While Mary His mother was acquired for a price for Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Spirit.

Thus we see that, based on the interpretation of this scripture by a man who grew up in a community where it is alleged that many practices still conform to those of bible times, refer appendix I, page 255, a girl was "acquired for a price". As best I can determine, betrothal was a legal contract between the parents of the girl and the would be husband or his parents, depending on the age of the man and the agreement was secured by some form of dowry or other financial payment or gift from the parents of the man. The girl was then betrothed and this brought about a particular standing in the community.

This is demonstrated clearly in the account of Abraham procuring a wife for his son Isaac.

Genesis 24:1-67 reports:

1 Now Abraham was old, well advanced in age; and the LORD had blessed Abraham in all things.

2 So Abraham said to the oldest servant of his house, who ruled over all that he had, "Please, put your hand under my thigh,

3 "and I will make you swear by the LORD, the God of heaven and the God of the earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell;

4 "but you shall go to my country and to my family, and take a wife for my son Isaac."

5 And the servant said to him, "Perhaps the woman will not be willing to follow me to this land. Must I take your son back to the land from which you came?"

6 But Abraham said to him, "Beware that you do not take my son back there.

7 "The LORD God of heaven, who took me from my father's house and from the land of my family, and who spoke to me and swore to me, saying, 'To your descendants I give this land,' He will send His angel before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there.

8 "And if the woman is not willing to follow you, then you will be released from this oath; only do not take my son back there."

9 So the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master, and swore to him concerning this matter.

10 Then the servant took ten of his master's camels and departed, for all his master's goods were in his hand. And he arose and went to Mesopotamia, to the city of Nahor.

11 And he made his camels kneel down outside the city by a well of water at evening time, the time when women go out to draw water.

12 Then he said, "O LORD God of my master Abraham, please give me success this day, and show kindness to my master Abraham.

13 "Behold, I stand here by the well of water, and the daughters of the men of the city are coming out to draw water.

14 "Now let it be that the young woman to whom I say, 'Please let down your pitcher that I may drink,' and she says, 'Drink, and I will also give your camels a drink'-- let her be the one You have appointed for Your servant Isaac. And by this I will know that You have shown kindness to my master."

15 And it happened, before he had finished speaking, that behold, Rebekah, who was born to Bethuel, son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, came out with her pitcher on her shoulder.

16 Now the young woman was very beautiful to behold, a virgin; no man had known her. And she went down to the well, filled her pitcher, and came up.

17 And the servant ran to meet her and said, "Please let me drink a little water from your pitcher."

18 So she said, "Drink, my lord." Then she quickly let her pitcher down to her hand, and gave him a drink.

19 And when she had finished giving him a drink, she said, "I will draw water for your camels also, until they have finished drinking."

20 Then she quickly emptied her pitcher into the trough, ran back to the well to draw water, and drew for all his camels.

21 And the man, wondering at her, remained silent so as to know whether the LORD had made his journey prosperous or not.

22 So it was, when the camels had finished drinking, that the man took a golden nose ring weighing half a shekel, and two bracelets for her wrists weighing ten shekels of gold,

23 and said, "Whose daughter are you? Tell me, please, is there room in your father's house for us to lodge?"

24 So she said to him, "I am the daughter of Bethuel, Milcah's son, whom she bore to Nahor."

25 Moreover she said to him, "We have both straw and feed enough, and room to lodge."

26 Then the man bowed down his head and worshiped the LORD.

27 And he said, "Blessed be the LORD God of my master Abraham, who has not forsaken His mercy and His truth toward my master. As for me, being on the way, the LORD led me to the house of my master's brethren."

28 So the young woman ran and told her mother's household these things.

29 Now Rebekah had a brother whose name was Laban, and Laban ran out to the man by the well.

30 So it came to pass, when he saw the nose ring, and the bracelets on his sister's wrists, and when he heard the words of his sister Rebekah, saying, "Thus the man spoke to me," that he went to the man. And there he stood by the camels at the well.

31 And he said, "Come in, O blessed of the LORD! Why do you stand outside? For I have prepared the house, and a place for the camels."

32 Then the man came to the house. And he unloaded the camels, and provided straw and feed for the camels, and water to wash his feet and the feet of the men who were with him.

33 Food was set before him to eat, but he said, "I will not eat until I have told about my errand." And he said, "Speak on."

34 So he said, "I am Abraham's servant.

35 "The LORD has blessed my master greatly, and he has become great; and He has given him flocks and herds, silver and gold, male and female servants, and camels and donkeys.

36 "And Sarah my master's wife bore a son to my master when she was old; and to him he has given all that he has.

37 "Now my master made me swear, saying, 'You shall not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, in whose land I dwell;

38 'but you shall go to my father's house and to my family, and take a wife for my son.'

39 "And I said to my master, 'Perhaps the woman will not follow me.'

40 "But he said to me, 'The LORD, before whom I walk, will send His angel with you and prosper your way; and you shall take a wife for my son from my family and from my father's house.

41 'You will be clear from this oath when you arrive among my family; for if they will not give her to you, then you will be released from my oath.'

42 "And this day I came to the well and said, 'O LORD God of my master Abraham, if You will now prosper the way in which I go,

43 'behold, I stand by the well of water; and it shall come to pass that when the virgin comes out to draw water, and I say to her, "Please give me a little water from your pitcher to drink,"

44 'and she says to me, "Drink, and I will draw for your camels also,"-- let her be the woman whom the LORD has appointed for my master's son.'

45 "But before I had finished speaking in my heart, there was Rebekah, coming out with her pitcher on her shoulder; and she went down to the well and drew water. And I said to her, 'Please let me drink.'

46 "And she made haste and let her pitcher down from her shoulder, and said, 'Drink, and I will give your camels a drink also.' So I drank, and she gave the camels a drink also.

47 "Then I asked her, and said, 'Whose daughter are you?' And she said, 'The daughter of Bethuel, Nahor's son, whom Milcah bore to him.' So I put the nose ring on her nose and the bracelets on her wrists.

48 "And I bowed my head and worshiped the LORD, and blessed the LORD God of my master Abraham, who had led me in the way of truth to take the daughter of my master's brother for his son.

49 "Now if you will deal kindly and truly with my master, tell me. And if not, tell me, that I may turn to the right hand or to the left."

50 Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, "The thing comes from the LORD; we cannot speak to you either bad or good.

51 "Here is Rebekah before you; take her and go, and let her be your master's son's wife, as the LORD has spoken."

52 And it came to pass, when Abraham's servant heard their words, that he worshiped the LORD, bowing himself to the earth.

53 Then the servant brought out jewelry of silver, jewelry of gold, and clothing, and gave them to Rebekah. He also gave precious things to her brother and to her mother.

54 And he and the men who were with him ate and drank and stayed all night. Then they arose in the morning, and he said, "Send me away to my master."

55 But her brother and her mother said, "Let the young woman stay with us a few days, at least ten; after that she may go."

56 And he said to them, "Do not hinder me, since the LORD has prospered my way; send me away so that I may go to my master."

57 So they said, "We will call the young woman and ask her personally."

58 Then they called Rebekah and said to her, "Will you go with this man?" And she said, "I will go."

59 So they sent away Rebekah their sister and her nurse, and Abraham's servant and his men.

60 And they blessed Rebekah and said to her: "Our sister, may you become the mother of thousands of ten thousands; and may your descendants possess the gates of those who hate them."

61 Then Rebekah and her maids arose, and they rode on the camels and followed the man. So the servant took Rebekah and departed.

62 Now Isaac came from the way of Beer Lahai Roi, for he dwelt in the South.

63 And Isaac went out to meditate in the field in the evening; and he lifted his eyes and looked, and there, the camels were coming.

64 Then Rebekah lifted her eyes, and when she saw Isaac she dismounted from her camel;

65 for she had said to the servant, "Who is this man walking in the field to meet us?" And the servant said, "It is my master." So she took a veil and covered herself.

66 And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done.

67 Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. (NKJ)

This report clearly demonstrates that in verses 51-53, at the point that the agent of Abraham reached agreement with Rebekah and her family that she would marry Isaac, gifts were exchanged and it can reasonably be argued that at this point she was betrothed to Isaac. In verse 67, Isaac "took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her". There is no indication of any wedding ceremony or other preparation, they went into his mothers tent, Isaac "took", that is had sexual intercourse with, Rebekah and she became his wife.

We must therefore conclude that betrothal is a contract between the husband to be or his family and the bride to be and / or her family in terms of which an agreement is entered into that the man and the woman will marry. This agreement is secured by a gift or dowry which in Abrahams day was a substantial consideration if measured in monetary terms. Once this agreement had been entered into the virgin contractually belonged to the man and he was at liberty to make whatever arrangements might be agreed to with regard to the marriage ceremony. In section 9.g, page 30 there is further discussion with regard to the Jewish tradition in terms of which, having betrothed a woman, the man would return to his fathers house to prepare a place for her whereafter he would return for her at any time of the day or night as soon as his preparations were complete and she was expected to be ready and waiting for him whenever he came. Just as we are expected to prepare ourselves and be ready and waiting for our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ to return for us at any time!

Can we have any doubt that the significance of betrothal has largely been lost in our society? Can we also have any doubt that marriage, arranged by wise parents, assisted by the Holy Spirit of God, is God's intended plan for choosing life partners NOT the process of random, lust driven, selection that is common in our society today? Is it any wonder that so many marriages end in divorce? Is it not a tragedy that those who style themselves as leaders in the church today teach principles which so comprehensively ignore the truths of scripture? Are they not, indeed, heaping up great wrath for themselves on the day of judgement?

58. DURATION OF BETROTHAL

Our society and the church in particular advocate lengthy engagements "to make sure". What sort of betrothal is it if one get's betrothed "to make sure"? Surely that is a reflection of our perverted understanding of vows and of marriage? Surely one a man and woman are betrothed that is an irrevocable statement of intention to get married. Can one draw any other conclusion from the scriptures quoted in these pages?

As best as one can determine in the case of Isaac and Rebekkah as reported in Genesis 24:51-67 reports:

51 "Here is Rebekah before you; take her and go, and let her be your master's son's wife, as the LORD has spoken."

52 And it came to pass, when Abraham's servant heard their words, that he worshiped the LORD, bowing himself to the earth.

53 Then the servant brought out jewelry of silver, jewelry of gold, and clothing, and gave them to Rebekah. He also gave precious things to her brother and to her mother.

54 And he and the men who were with him ate and drank and stayed all night. Then they arose in the morning, and he said, "Send me away to my master."

55 But her brother and her mother said, "Let the young woman stay with us a few days, at least ten; after that she may go."

56 And he said to them, "Do not hinder me, since the LORD has prospered my way; send me away so that I may go to my master."

57 So they said, "We will call the young woman and ask her personally."

58 Then they called Rebekah and said to her, "Will you go with this man?" And she said, "I will go."

59 So they sent away Rebekah their sister and her nurse, and Abraham's servant and his men.

60 And they blessed Rebekah and said to her: "Our sister, may you become the mother of thousands of ten thousands; and may your descendants possess the gates of those who hate them."

61 Then Rebekah and her maids arose, and they rode on the camels and followed the man. So the servant took Rebekah and departed.

62 Now Isaac came from the way of Beer Lahai Roi, for he dwelt in the South.

63 And Isaac went out to meditate in the field in the evening; and he lifted his eyes and looked, and there, the camels were coming.

64 Then Rebekah lifted her eyes, and when she saw Isaac she dismounted from her camel;

65 for she had said to the servant, "Who is this man walking in the field to meet us?" And the servant said, "It is my master." So she took a veil and covered herself.

66 And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done.

67 Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. (NKJ)

As best we can determine, the day after the betrothal "by arrangement" and sight unseen, Rebekkah packed her bags and after a journey of probably a week or two came to Isaac. As best we can determine the marriage was immediately consumated with little fuss or celebration. There is no passage in scripture that I can identify that prescribes a lengthy waiting period after a decision has been taken to marry.

59. MARRIAGE FEASTS

Close examination of scripture reveals a number of references to marriage feasts and "the marriage supper of the lamb" but no reference to a ceremony with an officiating officer or priest. The form of ecumenical marriage practiced today is a ceremony derived from pagan practice which may have been instituted as little as five hundred years ago! This is discussed later in this document.

A few examples of marriage feasts in scripture include:

Genesis 29:20-30 describes the wedding of Jacob and Leah:

20 So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed only a few days to him because of the love he had for her.

21 Then Jacob said to Laban, "Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in to her."

22 And Laban gathered together all the men of the place and made a feast.

23 Now it came to pass in the evening, that he took Leah his daughter and brought her to Jacob; and he went in to her.

24 And Laban gave his maid Zilpah to his daughter Leah as a maid.

25 So it came to pass in the morning, that behold, it was Leah. And he said to Laban, "What is this you have done to me? Was it not for Rachel that I served you? Why then have you deceived me?"

26 And Laban said, "It must not be done so in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn.

27 "Fulfill her week, and we will give you this one also for the service which you will serve with me still another seven years."

28 Then Jacob did so and fulfilled her week. So he gave him his daughter Rachel as wife also.

29 And Laban gave his maid Bilhah to his daughter Rachel as a maid.

30 Then Jacob also went in to Rachel, and he also loved Rachel more than Leah. And he served with Laban still another seven years. (NKJ)

It is significant that Jacob did not realize that he had married Leah until the next morning. In other words, he consumated the marriage in the dark or with a woman who was veiled. There is no indication of any vows or "marriage ceremony" before he took her to bed. After a SEVEN DAY FEAST he consumated a marriage with a woman who was not the woman he was contracted to marry and yet he still accepted that he was married!

Judges 14:1-20 describes the marriage of Samson:

1 Now Samson went down to Timnah, and saw a woman in Timnah of the daughters of the Philistines.

2 So he went up and told his father and mother, saying, "I have seen a woman in Timnah of the daughters of the Philistines; now therefore, get her for me as a wife."

3 Then his father and mother said to him, "Is there no woman among the daughters of your brethren, or among all my people, that you must go and get a wife from the uncircumcised Philistines?" And Samson said to his father, "Get her for me, for she pleases me well."

4 But his father and mother did not know that it was of the LORD-- that He was seeking an occasion to move against the Philistines. For at that time the Philistines had dominion over Israel.

5 So Samson went down to Timnah with his father and mother, and came to the vineyards of Timnah. Now to his surprise, a young lion came roaring against him.

6 And the Spirit of the LORD came mightily upon him, and he tore the lion apart as one would have torn apart a young goat, though he had nothing in his hand. But he did not tell his father or his mother what he had done.

7 Then he went down and talked with the woman; and she pleased Samson well.

8 After some time, when he returned to get her, he turned aside to see the carcass of the lion. And behold, a swarm of bees and honey were in the carcass of the lion.

9 He took some of it in his hands and went along, eating. When he came to his father and mother, he gave some to them, and they also ate. But he did not tell them that he had taken the honey out of the carcass of the lion.

10 So his father went down to the woman. And Samson gave a feast there, for young men used to do so.

11 And it happened, when they saw him, that they brought thirty companions to be with him.

12 Then Samson said to them, "Let me pose a riddle to you. If you can correctly solve and explain it to me within the seven days of the feast, then I will give you thirty linen garments and thirty changes of clothing.

13 "But if you cannot explain it to me, then you shall give me thirty linen garments and thirty changes of clothing." And they said to him, "Pose your riddle, that we may hear it."

14 So he said to them: "Out of the eater came something to eat, and out of the strong came something sweet." Now for three days they could not explain the riddle.

15 But it came to pass on the seventh day that they said to Samson's wife, "Entice your husband, that he may explain the riddle to us, or else we will burn you and your father's house with fire. Have you invited us in order to take what is ours? Is that not so?"

16 Then Samson's wife wept on him, and said, "You only hate me! You do not love me! You have posed a riddle to the sons of my people, but you have not explained it to me." And he said to her, "Look, I have not explained it to my father or my mother; so should I explain it to you?"

17 Now she had wept on him the seven days while their feast lasted. And it happened on the seventh day that he told her, because she pressed him so much. Then she explained the riddle to the sons of her people.

18 So the men of the city said to him on the seventh day before the sun went down: "What is sweeter than honey? And what is stronger than a lion?" And he said to them: "If you had not plowed with my heifer, you would not have solved my riddle!"

19 Then the Spirit of the LORD came upon him mightily, and he went down to Ashkelon and killed thirty of their men, took their apparel, and gave the changes of clothing to those who had explained the riddle. So his anger was aroused, and he went back up to his father's house.

20 And Samson's wife was given to his companion, who had been his best man. (NKJ)

Again we see a seven day feast but no indication of any formal marriage ceremony.

Esther 2:18 describes the feast given by King Ahasuerus after he had consumated his relationship with Esther:

18 Then the king made a great feast, the Feast of Esther, for all his officials and servants; and he proclaimed a holiday in the provinces and gave gifts according to the generosity of a king. (NKJ)

John 2:1-11 describes the wedding feast at which Jesus turned water into wine:

1 On the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there.

2 Now both Jesus and His disciples were invited to the wedding.

3 And when they ran out of wine, the mother of Jesus said to Him, "They have no wine."

4 Jesus said to her, "Woman, what does your concern have to do with Me? My hour has not yet come."

5 His mother said to the servants, "Whatever He says to you, do it."

6 Now there were set there six waterpots of stone, according to the manner of purification of the Jews, containing twenty or thirty gallons apiece.

7 Jesus said to them, "Fill the waterpots with water." And they filled them up to the brim.

8 And He said to them, "Draw some out now, and take it to the master of the feast." And they took it.

9 When the master of the feast had tasted the water that was made wine, and did not know where it came from (but the servants who had drawn the water knew), the master of the feast called the bridegroom.

10 And he said to him, "Every man at the beginning sets out the good wine, and when the guests have well drunk, then the inferior. You have kept the good wine until now!"

11 This beginning of signs Jesus did in Cana of Galilee, and manifested His glory; and His disciples believed in Him. (NKJ)

Matthew 25:1-13 describes a wedding feast:

1 "Then the kingdom of heaven shall be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.

2 "Now five of them were wise, and five were foolish.

3 "Those who were foolish took their lamps and took no oil with them,

4 "but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.

5 "But while the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept.

6 "And at midnight a cry was heard: 'Behold, the bridegroom is coming; go out to meet him!'

7 "Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps.

8 "And the foolish said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.'

9 "But the wise answered, saying, 'No, lest there should not be enough for us and you; but go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.'

10 "And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding; and the door was shut.

11 "Afterward the other virgins came also, saying, 'Lord, Lord, open to us!'

12 "But he answered and said, 'Assuredly, I say to you, I do not know you.'

13 "Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming. (NKJ)

At this wedding, ten virgins, a type of the body of Christ, apparently prepare to marry the same man at one time. It is notable that there is no indication of the exact time at which the wedding feast will commence.

Matthew 22:1-14 speaks of another wedding feast:

1 And Jesus answered and spoke to them again by parables and said:

2 "The kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who arranged a marriage for his son,

3 "and sent out his servants to call those who were invited to the wedding; and they were not willing to come.

4 "Again, he sent out other servants, saying, 'Tell those who are invited, "See, I have prepared my dinner; my oxen and fatted cattle are killed, and all things are ready. Come to the wedding."'

5 "But they made light of it and went their ways, one to his own farm, another to his business.

6 "And the rest seized his servants, treated them spitefully, and killed them.

7 "But when the king heard about it, he was furious. And he sent out his armies, destroyed those murderers, and burned up their city.

8 "Then he said to his servants, 'The wedding is ready, but those who were invited were not worthy.

9 'Therefore go into the highways, and as many as you find, invite to the wedding.'

10 "So those servants went out into the highways and gathered together all whom they found, both bad and good. And the wedding hall was filled with guests.

11 "But when the king came in to see the guests, he saw a man there who did not have on a wedding garment.

12 "So he said to him, 'Friend, how did you come in here without a wedding garment?' And he was speechless.

13 "Then the king said to the servants, 'Bind him hand and foot, take him away, and cast him into outer darkness; there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.'

14 "For many are called, but few are chosen." (NKJ)

Again it appears that there was no prior notification of the exact time at which the wedding feast would commence. It seems that once the bridegroom and his family were ready he would go and fetch the bride and the guests were expected to drop everything and come!

Revelation 19:6-9 describes the ultimate wedding supper:

6 And I heard, as it were, the voice of a great multitude, as the sound of many waters and as the sound of mighty thunderings, saying, "Alleluia! For the Lord God Omnipotent reigns!

7 "Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife has made herself ready."

8 And to her it was granted to be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright, for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints.

9 Then he said to me, "Write: 'Blessed are those who are called to the marriage supper of the Lamb!'" And he said to me, "These are the true sayings of God." (NKJ)

Significantly this passage states that "His wife has made herself ready", thus we see the thought of some of the previous marriage feasts carried through. The wife made herself ready and expectantly waited for the bride groom. If we consider the false doctrines and heresies unveiled in this book can we truly say that the bride is ready at this time?

Thus we see that our modern paradigm of a society wedding, scheduled months in advance, generally to suit the brides preferences with regard to date and venue, seems to be a far cry from the wedding feast of scripture. It has no legal standing, there is no "wedding ceremony" with an officiating officer and even if the bridegroom gets into bed with the wrong woman he is still married to her, but he is free to marry the correct woman at his convenience!

60. CONSUMATION OF MARRIAGE

In our society today there is an overwhelming belief that marriage consists of a series of vows administered by a licenced officer in front of witnesses. Is this supported by scripture?

Genesis 24:67 quoted above reports:

67 Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. (NKJ)

In this case it seems clear that Isaac had sexual intercourse with Rebekah and she became his wife. Let us consider a few other scriptures:

Genesis 4:19:

19 Then Lamech took for himself two wives: the name of one was Adah, and the name of the second was Zillah. (NKJ)

Genesis 6:2:

2 that the sons of God saw the daughters of men, that they were beautiful; and they took wives for themselves of all whom they chose. (NKJ)

Genesis 11:29:

29 Then Abram and Nahor took wives: the name of Abram's wife was Sarai, and the name of Nahor's wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran the father of Milcah and the father of Iscah. (NKJ)

Genesis 25:1:

1 Abraham again took a wife, and her name was Keturah. (NKJ)

Genesis 26:34:

34 When Esau was forty years old, he took as wives Judith the daughter of Beeri the Hittite, and Basemath the daughter of Elon the Hittite. (NKJ)

Genesis 38:6:

6 Then Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. (NKJ)

Strong defines the word "took", Strong's number 3947 laqach (law-kakh');

a primitive root; to take (in the widest variety of applications):

KJV-- accept, bring, buy, carry away, drawn, fetch, get, infold, X many, mingle, place, receive (-ing), reserve, seize, send for, take (away, -ing, up), use, win.

Consider also that Deuteronomy 22:13-19, discussed in section 8, page 19 and elsewhere in this book is quite clear:

13 "If any man takes a wife, and goes in to her, and detests her,

14 "and charges her with shameful conduct, and brings a bad name on her, and says, 'I took this woman, and when I came to her I found she was not a virgin,'

15 "then the father and mother of the young woman shall take and bring out the evidence of the young woman's virginity to the elders of the city at the gate.

16 "And the young woman's father shall say to the elders, 'I gave my daughter to this man as wife, and he detests her;

17 'now he has charged her with shameful conduct, saying, "I found your daughter was not a virgin," and yet these are the evidences of my daughter's virginity.' And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city.

18 "Then the elders of that city shall take that man and punish him;

19 "and they shall fine him one hundred shekels of silver and give them to the father of the young woman, because he has brought a bad name on a virgin of Israel. And she shall be his wife; he cannot divorce her all his days. (NKJ)

Deuteronomy 22:28-29, discussed in section 8, 25, page 20, 91 extends this to include the case of a man who seizes a young woman:

28 "If a man finds a young woman who is a virgin, who is not betrothed, and he seizes her and lies with her, and they are found out,

29 "then the man who lay with her shall give to the young woman's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife because he has humbled her; he shall not be permitted to divorce [put away] her all his days. (NKJ)

In this case can there be any doubt that the act of sexual intercourse has brought about a state of marriage? In other words, sexual intercourse with a virgin who is not betrothed IS MARRIAGE. This argument is consistently supported by much that appears in this book, as clearly established in section 8, page 19, the blood covenant of marriage is cut in the flesh of the virgin bride through the perforation of the hymen.

This principle finds practical application in Judges 21:15-23:

15 And the people grieved for Benjamin, because the LORD had made a void in the tribes of Israel.

16 Then the elders of the congregation said, "What shall we do for wives for those who remain, since the women of Benjamin have been destroyed?"

17 And they said, "There must be an inheritance for the survivors of Benjamin, that a tribe may not be destroyed from Israel.

18 "However, we cannot give them wives from our daughters, for the children of Israel have sworn an oath, saying, 'Cursed be the one who gives a wife to Benjamin.'"

19 Then they said, "In fact, there is a yearly feast of the LORD in Shiloh, which is north of Bethel, on the east side of the highway that goes up from Bethel to Shechem, and south of Lebonah."

20 Therefore they instructed the children of Benjamin, saying, "Go, lie in wait in the vineyards,

21 "and watch; and just when the daughters of Shiloh come out to perform their dances, then come out from the vineyards, and every man catch a wife for himself from the daughters of Shiloh; then go to the land of Benjamin.

22 "Then it shall be, when their fathers or their brothers come to us to complain, that we will say to them, 'Be kind to them for our sakes, because we did not take a wife for any of them in the war; for it is not as though you have given the women to them at this time, making yourselves guilty of your oath.'"

23 And the children of Benjamin did so; they took enough wives for their number from those who danced, whom they caught. Then they went and returned to their inheritance, and they rebuilt the cities and dwelt in them. (NKJ)

Our society today may call this thing "barbaric", however it is in scripture and it is according to scripture. The bottom line is that once a man has taken a virgin sexually she is his wife!

61. MARRIAGE OF CONVERTS TO SPOUSES WHO DO NOT CONVERT

***

62. SOME CONTROVERSIAL QUESTIONS

*** Quote from notes on World Aflame on laws not in scripture page 130 the freedom to do what is not specifically banned. God wants us to use our own judgment- Herneutics and Phariseeism

*** Quote also from Barclay

While, in principle I would hope that by this time many questions have been answered, there are further questions which are likely arise to which certain individuals will desire an answer. Unfortunately some of these questions deal with issues which you may find offensive. If this is the case I would urge you to skip over the following sections, however, they deal with issues which are very real in the lives of many millions of people and therefore they are deserving of answers.

a. DIVISION OF SEXUAL ACTIVITY BETWEEN WIVES

One of the immediate objections that is offered to the idea of a man having more than one wife is that the existing wife will be short changed of her sexual favours. To the contrary, limited information at my disposal from speaking to several men who have more than one wife the indications are that a man's libido increases when he has more than one woman and that he is indeed able to satisfy his wives.

This also gives rise to a situation where a wife who does not desire to fall pregnant can manage the timing of her sexual contact with her husband to periods of the month where the probability of pregnancy is reduced. Since there are other wives she can do this without concern for short changing her husband.

b. MASTURBATION

Masturbation is a subject on which most Christian teachings are divided. It is alleged that scripture is silent on this topic. However, consider Leviticus 15:16-19:

16 'If any man has an emission of semen, then he shall wash all his body in water, and be unclean until evening.

17 'And any garment and any leather on which there is semen, it shall be washed with water, and be unclean until evening.

18 'Also, when a woman lies with a man, and there is an emission of semen, they shall bathe in water, and be unclean until evening.

19 'If a woman has a discharge, and the discharge from her body is blood, she shall be set apart seven days; and whoever touches her shall be unclean until evening. (NKJ)

Surely since there is no reference to how the emission comes about it is reasonable to assume that self stimulation could give rise to the emission referred to. In fact, practical experience would tend to suggest that, in general, a man does not have an emission of semen unless there is some form of masturbation.

Furthermore, verse 18 deals with an emission of semen during sexual intercourse, presumably preferring to any semen which does not remain within the woman's body but which is discharged onto either of their bodies or flows out of her body after withdrawal. Surely this is likely to be a routine occurence where a man has sexual intercourse with his wife, in other words, such emission is not sinful, it is simply a routine emission which brings about a state of uncleanness in the sight of our Holy God which precludes the people concerned from participating in certain rites of temple worship.

Note further that verse 19 deals with the menstrual discharge of a woman which, in terms of the way in which God created woman, she is obliged to experience every month for a period of approximately seven days. Therefore, while scripture declares her unclean during this period it does not in any way suggest that she has sinned or done wrong in the sight of God.

From this passage of scripture it must appear that Yahweh does not necessarily regard seminal emission on the part of the man in response to self stimulation when he is not able to release his sexual tension with his wife as being unacceptable. It would seem that the issue of whether masturbation on the part of the male is acceptable in the sight of God hinges more on the reasons and the thoughts that accompany it. Jesus made it quite clear in Matthew 5:28:

28 "But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (NKJ)

On the basis that the word woman in this context almost certainly refers to a woman who is another man's wife we must surely conclude that masturbation while looking at pornography or fantasizing about a woman who is not one's wife is indeed sin. However, there does not appear to be any scripture that prevents a man who is away from home and has a sexual need from fantasizing about his wife or wives. A man who is well known to me claims that he has had experience in terms of the one flesh bond where such fantasy has been fulfilling and brought him seemingly spiritually closer to the woman in question. Whether or not this is technically the case in the spiritual realm it does appear that there is absolutely no reason why a man should not masturbate provided his thoughts are directed at his wife and it is not something which becomes an idol in his life or a substitute for sex.

Insofar as it appears that most women are capable of orgasm by clitoral stimulation and insofar as the clitoris is readily accessible for self stimulation without requiring vaginal penetration and therefore damage of the hymen in virgins one most presumable conclude that there is no reason why a woman who is not with her husband should not release sexual tension by self stimulation of her clitoris. Again the caveat must presumably be that she should not fantasize or think about any man other than her husband.

c. OTHER HUSBAND - WIFE SEXUAL CONTACT

By extension of the thoughts in the previous section it would appear that there is absolutely no scriptural reason why a husband and wife or wives should not participate in mutual sexual stimulation including masturbation to orgasm and ejaculation.

By further extension, there appears to be no scripture which prevents a woman from orally stimulating her husband or from bringing him to climax in her mouth and conversely there is no scripture to prevent her husband from orally stimulating her vulva and clitoris and bringing her to climax in this way. Whether they do so in practice is a matter of personal taste and preference and there is not any scripture that I have been able to identify which prohibits such contact.

Taking this one step further we find a challenging concept in Leviticus 18:22:

22 'You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination. (NKJ)

This is confirmed in Leviticus 20:13:

13 'If a man lies with a male as he lies with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them. (NKJ)

Clearly this refers to homosexual contact between two men which, I am told, generally involves anal penetration of the one male by the other. This must surely be the sense of both the above scriptures. Reference to other scriptures in which the same Hebrew word "shakab", here translated "lie" indicates that it refers to carnal intercourse or copulation. This raises the challenging extension that if scripture says that man should not copulate with a man as he copulates with a woman and since man does not have a vagina, the reference must be to anal penetration. The extension would seem to suggest that scripture does not prevent anal penetration of a woman by her husband. Insofar as there are secular writings which indicate that many men and women do, indeed, enjoy anal penetration of the woman as a sexual derivative and form of contraception, it would seem that this is not against scripture.

Again, as offensive as one may find this suggestion, we must surely abide by the prerequisite that if we cannot support our opinion with scripture we should be cautious about imposing our opinions on others. I am not advocating that men should penetrate their wives anally but I am stating that should a man and wife choose to experiment this way or include this in their sexual repertoire, as far as I can determine, there is no scripture to prevent it. In considering this statement, consider also that Yahweh, who knows all things, has seen fit to create man and woman such that anal penetration of the wife by the husband is mechanically possible and such that some women in particular claim to find such penetration pleasureable. Is it possible that this is a form of contraception that God intended from the start? I do not wish to enter into this speculation, only to say we do not know and, unless someone can find a scripture which clearly prohibits such conduct, we should refrain from condemming any person.

d. SEXUAL CONTACT BETWEEN WIVES

It is noted in section 12, page 49 that there is no scripture which prohibits the wives of the same man from being sexually intimate with one another. Today this is generally labelled "lesbianism" but it appears that lesbianism may include the connotation of two women living together as "husband" and "wife" with one of the women being termed "butch" and playing a pseudo male role. It would seem that this is, indeed an abomination in the sight of God but there is no real scripture to confirm this other than perhaps what is referred to in Romans 1:24-32:

24 Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves,

25 who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.

26 For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature.

27 Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due.

28 And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting;

29 being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers,

30 backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,

31 undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful;

32 who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them. (NKJ)

Overall, however, it would appear that there is no scripture which prevents two women, married to the same man, from being sexually intimate with one another, either alone or in the presense of their husband, there is also no scripture which prevents a man from being sexually intimate with two or more wives simultaneously.

There are, however, some scriptures which suggest that sexual exposure between women may have been quite accepted in Bible times.

Consider Genesis 30:1-5:

1 Now when Rachel saw that she bore Jacob no children, Rachel envied her sister, and said to Jacob, "Give me children, or else I die!"

2 And Jacob's anger was aroused against Rachel, and he said, "Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?"

3 So she said, "Here is my maid Bilhah; go in to her, and she will bear a child on my knees, that I also may have children by her."

4 Then she gave him Bilhah her maid as wife, and Jacob went in to her.

5 And Bilhah conceived and bore Jacob a son. (NKJ)

Furthermore, history suggests that in Bible times many people lived in single room houses. This seems to be supported by Luke 11:5-10:

5 And He said to them, "Which of you shall have a friend, and go to him at midnight and say to him, 'Friend, lend me three loaves;

6 'for a friend of mine has come to me on his journey, and I have nothing to set before him';

7 "and he will answer from within and say, 'Do not trouble me; the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot rise and give to you'?

8 "I say to you, though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs.

9 "So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

10 "For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. (NKJ)

Presumably, if the man's children are in bed with him, so is his wife or wives? By implication real privacy may have been somewhat restricted in such a dwelling place. I have not researched this but it would seem that this situation must still persist in billions of low income dwellings around the world where the entire family dwells in a single space. In such circumstances it could well be difficult for a man to have intercourse with one wife without any other wives witnessing the act and therefore it would seem not unreasonable to conclude that they might participate?

Again, I am not seeking to be contentious but the reallity is that there are millions of men and women in the world who regularly participate in sexual situations in which more than one woman participates in sexual intercourse with one man at the same time. If such people are to become Christians and there is no scriptural prohibition on a form of sexual activity that they are accustomed to and enjoy, surely it is incumbent on all of us not to set hurdles in their way in the name of Christ by telling them that Christ has prohibited such conduct if we do not have robust scriptural evidence to support this view? I know a man who claims to have asked God about this specific issue and who claims that he received a vision from God in which God led him to a specific magazine in a specific shop to demonstrate to him that, in the sight of God, there was no objection to a man being sexually intimate with two wives at the same time and that God had no objection to those two wives being sexually intimate in the absence of their husband. Such a situation fully accommodates the sexual needs of a man's wives when he is absent from home and removes sexual tension on the part of the wives as a justification for adultery or divorce. If this is the case we would all be well advised not to preach or teach against such conduct between a husband and his wives.

63. THE SCRIPTURAL AGE OF WOMEN AT MARRIAGE

While dealing with some of the more directly controversial aspects of current doctrine at the level of individual conduct, let us consider again the question of the age at which Yahweh intended men and women to marry which has already been touched on in previous sections.

In this specific regard some years ago I was led by the Lord to pick up a copy of "The Talmud, The Stehsaltz Edition, Volume IX, Tractate Ketubot, Part III dealing specifically with the following passages of scripture as set out in the "Introduction to Chapter Three":

"And if a man seduces a virgin who has not been betrothed and lies with her, he shall surely make her his wife. If her father will surely refuse to give her to him, he shall pay money according to the dowry of virgins." (Exodus 22:15-16.)

"If a man finds a virgin na'arah who has not been betrothed, and seizes her and lies with her, and they are found, then the man who lay with her shall give to the father of the na'arah fifty pieces of silver, and she shall be his wife, for he has humbled her. He cannot let her go all his days." (Deuteronomy 22:28-29.)

The opening commentary states:

"The laws concerning the seducer or the rapist of a girl between twelve and twelve-and-a-half years old are stated explicitly in the Torah. However, because these laws are written in a very terse style, many questions demanding practical Halakhic solutions remain open."

Subsequently, under the heading "Concepts" the following statement is made:

"And from when she produces two pubic hairs until she becomes mature. The Halakhah defines legal majority in terms of sexual maturity. Hence it is signalled by the growth of pubic hair ("two hairs"). Although this sign usually appears close to the age of adolescence (thirteen for a boy, twelve for a girl), it is merely the beginning of a process, which continues for a certain time until the child has indeed attained full sexual maturity (not, however, the completion of his or her physical or spiritual growth). According to the Halakhah, we assume that this period lasts no longer than six months. During the transitional stage children, especially girls, have a special Halakhic status. The girl is called a na'arah, and her father retains some authority over her, as when she was a minor. special laws (regarding rape, or sexual promiscuity) also apply to the na'arah to with respect to her sexual status. After six months have elapsed, the girl becomes mature and is entirely independent, and the laws applying to adult women apply to her."

The Talmud goes into great detail regarding the interpretation of these scriptures at a level of detail which is not relevant to this discussion. Much of this detail is also, as best I can determine, legalistic and not inspired by the Spirit of God as it seems to give rise to distinctions which defeat what seems to me to be the Spirit of the Word of God as I have understood it and set out to record it in these pages. This is not to say that there is not other material in the Talmud pertaining to this subject which may be relevant. For example there is a ruling to the effect that sexual intercourse with a girl under three years old "is not considered true intercourse for any legal purpose", a statement that I have to admit to having great difficulty with. Sexual intercourse with a girl above the age of three years old IS considered Halakhically significant. Again, while most of us find the idea of sexual intercourse with a girl over three years and under twelve years highly offensive it is important that we realize that the body of learning of the Jews dating back to the days of Jesus clearly indicate that the age of sexual, spiritual and legal maturity of a girl is twelve and a half years.

A further reference is obtained from a document entitled "The Gospel of the Birth of Mary" published in a volume entitled "The Lost Books of the Bible published in New York on January 1, 1926, which I obtained from the Library of the University of South Africa. The document is alleged to have been referenced by Jerome and to date back to about the fourth century. I have not way of validating this claim and it is not central to my reason for quoting the extract that follows. Equally, it is clear that the document is NOT inspired of God and is, at best, a fanciful fairy tale which contains much which is not scriptural. However, recognizing that it is a work of some antiquity it seems to me that the following passage is of some significance. In chapter V, verses 3 and 4, the following is reported:

So that when at length she arrived to her fourteenth year, ...... At that time the high-priest made a public order. That all virgins who had public settlements in the temple, and were come to this age, should return home, and as they were now of a proper maturity, should, according to the custom of their country, endeavour to be married.

We thus have a second independent source of some antiquity which indicates that an age of not more than fourteen years was the age at which a girl should marry.

As with much in this document which readers may find offensive, it is important that we understand why this is relevant. May I suggest the following:

a. If God designed a girl to marry at twelve and a half, the age at which she becomes sexually aware, then to impute bad morals to a girl of this age or older who develops an intense interest in sex, as happens typically when a girl is between twelve and fifteen, is to be extremely unjust.

b. Assuming that the Talmud is accurate, which I truly believe that it is, then according to God's plan is that as soon as a girl becomes sexually aware she will be married.

c. In such a situation all her sexual energy and interest will, from the beginning, be focused on her husband and she will devote herself entirely to pleasing him.

d. Assuming that, in general, the husband would be several years older, a point which I will develop shortly, it would be relatively easy for such a young girl, whose personallity was still being formed and who had no worldly experience, to reverence and submit to her older and more experienced husband in accordance with scripture.

e. Under such a dispensation the idea of a teenage woman dating numerous boys, flirtations, crushes, "puppy love" and numerous other phenomena which we today take for granted as part of growing up would not occur. There would further be no need for parents to concern themselves with girls getting involved in "french kissing", petting and other activities which could place their emotions and their virginity at risk. All such energy and experimentation and emotion would be singularly focused on the husband of their youth.

f. Can there be any doubt that a marriage consumated under such circumstances would have a much better prospect of success, particularly within a culture of scriptural orthodoxy which considered marriage for life to be a committment expected of both husband and wife?

g. Again, the clear caveat is that the husband and the wife should be true believers and that the husband should be a relatively mature man of God who was truly seeking to become like Jesus.

I have no doubt that the above interpretation is substantially correct and that, accordingly, those who constantly condemn the sexual tendencies of the youth should stop and carefully examine who is responsible for the condition in which the youth find themselves. If in fact it is the adults of this generation who are imposing a perverse and unscriptural doctrine which they, in their youth found to be burdensome, is it not time that the doctrine was brought into line with scripture?

64. THE SCRIPTURAL AGE OF MEN AT MARRIAGE

Having made the above points about women it is relevant to consider the age that scripture indicates for a man to marry.

In the first instance there are a number of examples of men who married for the first time at forty:

Genesis 25:20 states:

20 Isaac was forty years old when he took Rebekah as wife, the daughter of Bethuel the Syrian of Padan Aram, the sister of Laban the Syrian. (NKJ)

Genesis 26:34 states:

34 When Esau was forty years old, he took as wives Judith the daughter of Beeri the Hittite, and Basemath the daughter of Elon the Hittite. (NKJ)

Careful reading of scripture would seem to indicate that Moses was about forty years old when he married Zipporah in Midian. As best I understand it, David was probably in his fifties or sixties when he committed adultery with Bathsheba and took her as his wife. Accordingly there is reasonable scriptural basis to indicate men in their forties and older marrying twelve year old virgins!

There are a significant number of scriptures which refer to men above the age of twenty as being effectively adult:

Exodus 38:25-26 states:

25 And the silver from those who were numbered of the congregation was one hundred talents and one thousand seven hundred and seventy-five shekels, according to the shekel of the sanctuary:

26 a bekah for each man (that is, half a shekel, according to the shekel of the sanctuary), for everyone included in the numbering from twenty years old and above, for six hundred and three thousand, five hundred and fifty men. (NKJ)

Numbers 1:1-3 states:

1 Now the LORD spoke to Moses in the Wilderness of Sinai, in the tabernacle of meeting, on the first day of the second month, in the second year after they had come out of the land of Egypt, saying:

2 "Take a census of all the congregation of the children of Israel, by their families, by their fathers' houses, according to the number of names, every male individually,

3 "from twenty years old and above-- all who are able to go to war in Israel. You and Aaron shall number them by their armies. (NKJ)

Numbers 14:28-32 states:

28 "Say to them, 'As I live,' says the LORD, 'just as you have spoken in My hearing, so I will do to you:

29 'The carcasses of you who have complained against Me shall fall in this wilderness, all of you who were numbered, according to your entire number, from twenty years old and above.

30 'Except for Caleb the son of Jephunneh and Joshua the son of Nun, you shall by no means enter the land which I swore I would make you dwell in.

31 'But your little ones, whom you said would be victims, I will bring in, and they shall know the land which you have despised.

32 'But as for you, your carcasses shall fall in this wilderness. (NKJ)

In all of these passages it appears that God attaches particular significance to the age of twenty for a male. Those above the age of twenty are "able to go to war", those less than twenty years old are not accountable and are classified as "little ones" in Numbers 14:31. It would therefore appear that Yahweh regards a male of twenty years old as being fully mature and accountable for his actions, presumably this would suggest that he is also ready for the responsibility of a wife and children?

If this is the case we see the minimum age gap between husband and wife envisaged by God as being approximately seven and a half years, a gap which would ensure that the husband was sufficiently mature and sufficiently older than his young wife that she would have no difficulty in accepting him as her head, in looking up to him, reverencing him and submitting to him as scripture requires. Do we not create a recipe for disaster in current social practice which generally sees both husband and wife in their early twenties with little or no age gap between them and the wife every bit as worldly and experienced as her husband? How can we realistically expect a wife in such a situation to respect her husband and reverence him? How can we expect him to command her respect? And then the church perverts the Word of God to apply worldly principles to "marriage counselling" directed at making this ungodly recipe work in practice! Surely this is a stench and an abomination in the nostrils of the Most High God?!

65. A MENSTRUATING WOMAN IS IMPURE

Leviticus 20:18, quoted in section 14, page 55, with regard to God's defintion of sexual sin, states:

18 'If a man lies with a woman during her sickness and uncovers her nakedness, he has exposed her flow, and she has uncovered the flow of her blood. Both of them shall be cut off from their people.

Ezekial 18:5-9 states:

5 But if a man is just and does what is lawful and right;

6 If he has not eaten on the mountains, nor lifted up his eyes to the idols of the house of Israel, nor defiled his neighbor's wife, nor approached a woman during her impurity;

7 If he has not oppressed anyone, but has restored to the debtor his pledge; has robbed no one by violence, but has given his bread to the hungry and covered the naked with clothing;

8 If he has not exacted usury nor taken any increase, but has withdrawn his hand from iniquity and executed true judgment between man and man;

9 If he has walked in My statutes and kept My judgments faithfully-- he is just; he shall surely live!" Says the Lord GOD. (NKJ)

Surely this is quite clear, a man who approaches a woman during her impurity is not just and is not keeping the Lord's statutes AND WILL DIE or at least NOT surely live!

Leviticus 15:26-27 states:

26 'Every bed on which she lies all the days of her discharge shall be to her as the bed of her impurity; and whatever she sits on shall be unclean, as the uncleanness of her impurity.

27 'Whoever touches those things shall be unclean; he shall wash his clothes and bathe in water, and be unclean until evening. (NKJ)

A husband is not so much as to touch whatever his wife sits on, let alone touch his wife! I wonder how many men and women are breaking this commandment? Do you think that this would happen to the same extent if those men had more than one wife? Why is the church not teaching that sex during menstruation is not acceptable in the sight of God?

In addition to the scriptures quoted above, consider Ezekial 22:10:

10 "In you men uncover their fathers' nakedness; in you they violate women who are set apart during their impurity. (NKJ)

Consider further Ezekial 36:17:

17 "Son of man, when the house of Israel dwelt in their own land, they defiled it by their own ways and deeds; to Me their way was like the uncleanness of a woman in her customary impurity. (NKJ)

Can there be any doubt that Yahweh requires men and women to respect the period of separation for a menstruating woman?

66. THE UNLOVED WIFE

One of the most difficult scriptures for the modern church to accept in the context of what is taught in these pages must surely be the provisions for an unloved wife:

Deuteronomy 21:15-17 states:

15 "If a man has two wives, one loved and the other unloved, and they have borne him children, both the loved and the unloved, and if the firstborn son is of her who is unloved,

16 "then it shall be, on the day he bequeaths his possessions to his sons, that he must not bestow firstborn status on the son of the loved wife in preference to the son of the unloved, the true firstborn.

17 "But he shall acknowledge the son of the unloved wife as the firstborn by giving him a double portion of all that he has, for he is the beginning of his strength; the right of the firstborn is his. (NKJ)

Here we have another passage with explicit provision for a man to have two wives at least.

In addition, we have explicit provision for one of those wives to be unloved!!! Surely this must squash the idea of one perfect partner, the idealistic searching for wife after wife and husband after husband, scrapping each previous relationship in the process. Surely we are clearly taught by the scriptures recorded in these pages that once a man has married a woman they are married for life barring some very specific situations which permit divorce?

At the same time, this should not be cause for dismay on the part of such an unloved wife. Prayerful consideration of the contents of this book and particularly the scriptures presented in this section and the vision of marriage presented under the title "Wow! So that's how Jesus loves me!, reproduced in Appendix Q, page 280, will reveal the steps that are necessary for an unloved wife to become loved. The case history in section 81, page 207 clearly teaches that if a woman gives herself totally to a man, submits to him and meets his every sexual need, he CANNOT help but love her. God's recipe of simple loving reverence and submission is far more powerful than anything that Satan can throw at you. But, if you are an unloved wife, you may have to change your attitude to your husband AND to love making, dramatically. You should take particular note of the comments made in section 54, page 151 on the love between husbands and wives.

God's plan for marriage is infinitely better than we know it to be and He has provided supernatural mechanisms to ensure that Godly marriage WILL WORK AND WILL BE GOOD.

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